richjaybitch's Posts

#freezerbird, #vlog, #checkitout

Dead.Yeti and emiledi77 like this

mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.

#mushrooms, #umbrellas

emiledi77, Greyeyebelle, janeh, Sunshine123, mylisa1970, SimonLauper, swatchUSA and PenSword72 like this

It's my birthday and I'll fly if I want to!

#sohigh

emiledi77, janeh, avant-garde, makalapua and PenSword72 like this

#hipster, #stardom

naebitnae, emiledi77 and nicolamufasa like this

#alicephoebelou

emiledi77, ranjithbantu, nicolamufasa and swatchUSA like this

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think "oh shit it's the cops"?

Reposted from anonymous

#fuckdapolice

emiledi77, kiminko, janeh, ranjithbantu and swatchUSA like this

You
can't
eat
money!

#healthfirst, #money, #eat, #you, #be, #fuckcapitalism

emiledi77, janeh, n.schi, JodieT, meohmy, swatchUSA and PenSword72 like this

I finally found love..

..on page 566 in the dictionary •

Reposted from Lirpae..

#thanksoxford, #ilovewords

emiledi77, Greyeyebelle, kiminko, janeh and JodieT like this

I love you with all my penis.

Reposted from satan

#willyoumarryme

emiledi77, janeh, satan, juneocallagh and PenSword72 like this

Kill your
past.

Rebirth to
now.

#powerofnow, #man

emiledi77, janeh, kj55 and Demetrius like this

Hoody,
or not
hoody.

That is
the question.

#winterchoices, #tobe, #cold, #imisssummer

emiledi77, janeh, PenSword72 and creatorbeats like this

Time
is
an
illusion

#time, #illusion, #delusion, #powerofnow, #nowornever

janem803, emiledi77, janeh, PenSword72 and kj55 like this

#!!!, #sweetlife, #stuckinmyhead, #ohrworm

emiledi77, janeh and juneocallagh like this

Eat here...

Diet home.

#dieathome??, #germanenglish

janeh, avant-garde and juneocallagh like this

lovely
people
get
lovely
presents.

#xmas, #presents, #lovely, #you

janeh, Gabbem, supermom, juneocallagh and PenSword72 like this

How to spot fake news:

1. Turn on the news.

#fakenews

janeh, UserOne, swatchUSA, PenSword72, Jamille, JodieT, meohmy and kj55 like this

Meanwhile in Iraq, the Taliban are attempting to
buy
peace with the American Nation by agreeing that no
more
bloodshed could continue
and they'd rather return
things
back to how they were before greed made them
stupid!

#fakenews, #readthefineprint

janeh and only1alyssa like this

Skywriting is like a
message in a bottle
to Outer Space!

#touchthesky, #etphonehome

janeh, PenSword72, JodieT, meohmy and Demetrius like this

stinky
pinky...

#pretty, #in, #pink

janeh and juneocallagh like this

all that glitters is sold.

#ausverkauft

janeh, JodieT, juneocallagh and allisonrae like this

#uratit

Greyeyebelle and janeh like this

People think I'm funny, but I'm not.

I'm just mean and everyone thinks I'm joking!

#imnotfunny

janeh, Demetrius, meohmy and hebdifescht like this

Three people sleeping together is called a threesome.

Two people sleeping together is a twosome.

Guess that's why people call me handsome.

Reposted from Alek

#onesome?

janeh, juneocallagh, PenSword72 and supermom like this

anyone who spends more than 20 minutes getting ready is not for me.

#keepitsimple, #naturalisbest, @kj55!

janeh, ranjithbantu, juneocallagh, PenSword72, kj55, Gabbem and avant-garde like this

Pure
Freude
zwischen
deinen
Beinen!

#pure, #pleasure, #between, #your, #legs

It's definitely
a movie night!

#movienight

janeh, juneocallagh, Gabbem, swatchUSA and PenSword72 like this

Live as if you'll die tomorrow.

Dream as if you'll live forever.

#live, #life, #dreamon, #you

janeh, juneocallagh and Gabbem like this

Please,
think for yourself!

I'm sick of explaining things you have the ability to figure out on your own!

#faaaaaark

janeh, juneocallagh, PenSword72, Gabbem and avant-garde like this

ignorance killed the reality tv star.

#deathtorealitytv

janeh and PenSword72 like this

Go tell
misterlab
to get his
ear pierced!

@misterlab, #piercetheear, #yes

juneocallagh, PenSword72 and JodieT like this

Death From Above
1979
Live
Private gig
Sold out
Guest list
Booyah!

#death, #from, #above, #1979, #live, #private, #gig, #life, #berlin, #yes

Kill
them with kindness

#killkillkill, #insults

janeh, jeve, PenSword72 and Demetrius like this

stupid autocorrect

you always end up posting some thong you didn't Nintendo.

Reposted from avant-garde

#nintendont

janeh, juneocallagh, supermom, avant-garde and swatchUSA like this

Enjoy
life
and
forget
about
time!

#lifelesson

janeh, juneocallagh, dor1316 and abe like this

How to fall down stairs:

Step 1
Step 6
Step 7,8,9,11

#followthesteps

janeh, UserOne, juneocallagh, PenSword72, JodieT, Gabbem, ccz6ih, Slotter6 and abe like this

A man reading a thesaurus saunters into a tavern

#reinventthejoke

janeh, PenSword72, dor1316, abe and makalapua like this

I wear a ski mask
to bed so if there's a home invasion the intruder will think I'm part of the team!

#sleepsafe

Greyeyebelle, janeh, UserOne, juneocallagh, jeve, Gabbem, ccz6ih, Loupi4614, abe, makalapua and 1 other like this

Glue a tiny mirror over your drivers licence photo so when you hand it to a cop he gets confused and starts arresting himself instead!

#howtodealwithcops

janeh, juneocallagh, JodieT and richjaybitch like this

The Torie's have come up with a policy to reduce binge drinking in Britain by 90%.

The policy's been dubbed 'Scottish Independence'.

#votewhatever, #or, #dontvote

janeh, abe, swatchUSA, JodieT and Slotter6 like this

Your sister was better.

#brutalhonesty

janeh, ellenicole and abe like this

You look like you fell out of the ugly tree,

and hit every branch on the way down!

#brutalhonesty

janeh, Talos210 and Demetrius like this

reposted by Talos210

It's not you,
it's everything you're not.

#brutalhonesty

janeh, Carris, ellenicole, Fabcookie, abe and foenix like this

My extra-sensitive toothpaste doesn't like it when I use other toothpastes!

#dental, #health, #is, #no, #laughing, #matter

sirskitten1, janeh, Gabbem, aehmpaeh, JodieT and abe like this

I can almost always tell if a movie doesn't use real dinosaurs.

#cgisucks

janeh, allisonrae, Gabbem, JodieT and abe like this

The quality of lock you use is usually respective to the quality of bike you have.

Mine's currently chained up with marshmallow logs!

#ineedanewbike

janeh, SimonLauper, swatchUSA, supermom and JodieT like this

reposted by swatchUSA

magnesion
electrosis
evoluting
cyclicant
spaciality

#makingupwords

janeh and GabiGabler like this

I hate when they wash your hair way before cutting it and you have to sit waiting with a towel on your head like a twat!

#twathead

janeh, juneocallagh, abe and supermom like this

Condoms made from bubble wrap??

Poppycock!

#handlewithcare, #fragile

janeh, juneocallagh, abe, supermom, JodieT and Slotter6 like this

da Nile
ain't just a
river in
Africa
my friend.

#denial

janeh, juneocallagh and abe like this

You may have heard that you are what you eat.

Well tonight, at midnight...
I plan to be you!

#midnightsnack

janeh, juneocallagh, supermom and abe like this

#friedrichshain

aehmpaeh likes this

#igotit

A house
divided...

is a condo

#abrahamlincoln, #ahousedivided, #cannotstand

janeh, UserOne, meohmy, PenSword72, juneocallagh, dor1316, abe and swatchUSA like this

reposted by juneocallagh

#goldmansachs

janeh and xecarggracex like this

Sometimes people call
me a gentleman, but never a gentle man.

#gentleman

janeh and Gabbem like this

If God takes life he's an indian giver!

#god, #controlfreak, #givethtaketh

janeh likes this

_ _ _ _ _ _ _
l l
l l
l MELT! l
l l
l_ _ _ _ _ _ _ l

hebdifescht likes this

Parklife
&
Lake Daze!

#parklife, #lakedaze, #summer, #summervibes

Closer
to
Heaven
in
Heels.

#allthesingleladies, #standtall, #you, #repost

I'd like to dedicate my 222nd post to Cap'n lollip2

#thanks, #for, #being, #cool, @lollip2

janeh and lollip2 like this

if love is an open door, then I've just been robbed!

#frozen, #opendoor, #purelove, #stolenheart

janeh likes this

I'm
afraid
of the
dark

I'm
over
here...

#horrorstory

biubiu, JodieT, Gabbem, topbuzz and ccz6ih like this

Liebe

für

ALLE!

#loveforall

Went to visit my Nan in the nursing home but they wouldn't let me in...
They had gone into lockdown: no one in,
no one out.
The reason? Serious diarrhoea drama!
I see flooded lifts like in The Shining!

#horrorstory

Gabbem likes this

on the door to my heart is a little sign that says:

'no junk mail'

#nojunkmail

#blueisthenewyou

swatchUSA likes this

"The only
thing we
found left
of him was
his balls..."

"They say he was
'beating the meat'".

#meatballs

lollip2 likes this

suck on my chocolate salty meatballs.

#meatballs, #isaachayes, #stickeminurmouth, #andsuckem

kj55, PenSword72, Gabbem and lollip2 like this

Sex,
Love
&
Meatballs

#meatballs

richjaybitch, robi316, kj55, PenSword72, Gabbem and allisonrae like this

#rockon, #davidessex

Next time you give me a hand job use your mouth

Reposted from anonymous

#gold

abe and brody like this

I reverse park using a
video
camera
bitches!

#parkingfordummies, #futuredaze, #car

brody and Stokn like this

Don't look
down at
anyone
unless
you're
helping
them up.

#respect

dor1316, brody, misterlab, Pesca, dreamworld and lovemychouchou like this

I
wonder
what you
look
like
naked...

#allday, #playthegame, #naked, #looks, #you, #me, #party

SimonLauper likes this

#streetboy, #streetart, #therichjayshow, #berlin, #you, #me, #party

jeve likes this

Back of
the net.

#goal!

evvelina and lollip2 like this

You look like the kind of person
who
catches
the bus!

#bus, #trip

sarcaSM and avant-garde like this

people who can Can Can can
Can Can!

#icancancan, #people, #you, #cancan

Red
Hot
Chili
Willy!

#thatsnotright, #repost, #you, #hot

Your best teacher is
your last
mistake.

#learn, #you, #bestteacher

I just went to a public toilet and it said:
'For a good time,
call John.'
I hate that...

No phone number or nothing!

#public, #vandal, #scandal, #goodtime, #callme

AJ_Luv likes this

#getlost

swatchUSA likes this

"The thing about quotes on the internet is that you can never verify their authenticity."

- Abraham Lincoln

#misquote

I thought the weekly contest this week was
'misquito'!

#misquote

ene and swatchUSA like this

Give a man the
whole thing
and he
won't know
what to do with it.
Give Men a
PEACE,
and they'll get it
together!

#peace

Real eyes
realise
Real lies!

#peace, #realise

swatchUSA, StuPC, PenSword72, anna.b, LoveFunApps and avant-garde like this

Peace
in the
Middle
East!

#peace, #yeahright!

mjf, FaithR and swatchUSA like this

The best
things
in life
aren't
things!

#free, #people, #you, #things, #thing, #thebest

niniel, PenSword72, begrian, Gabbem, kj55, SimonLauper and swatchUSA like this

Don't
let the
label
label
you!

#dontbeladeled, #dontbefooled, #label

PenSword72, begrian, Gabbem, kj55 and swatchUSA like this

#www.etikettradio.com

Hit me
with
your
rhythm
sticks!

#hitmehard, #hitmequick

Office hours?
More like, orifice ouch!

#dailygrind

swatchUSA likes this

If it wasn't
for KJ55
I don't
think I'd
get any
likes!

#thanks, @kj55, #you, #make, #my, #phone, #go, #bzzzzzzz

Gabbem, swatchUSA and kj55 like this

Show
me
the
Monet!

#monet, #art, #show, #me, #you, #showmethemoney

PenSword72 and kj55 like this

Love is like farting.
If you have to force it, then it's probably shit.

Reposted from Boldomatic

#beautiful!

kj55 and abe like this

Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got fucked to achieve it.

Reposted from slavina

#secretsofsuccess

kj55 and abe like this

originality is de
ad.

#diehippy

PenSword72 and kj55 like this

Let's go on a bender.
For the rest of our lives.

#whynot, #bender, #party, #warumnicht, #yolo

kj55 and swatchUSA like this

I don't
remember
everything,
but what I
do remember,
I forget.

#rememberme

dor1316, aenje, Gabbem and kj55 like this

reposted by kj55 and ACHunter

Hey Jesus,
when are the meek inheriting the Earth
you liar?!

#dominancesucks, #getmesomemeek, #gethimtothemeek

Du kannst
schon Nazi
sein,
aber dann
biste halt
kacke!

#yeah, #takethat

Loupi4614 likes this

Fick dich,
ich kann
kein Deutsch,
du Pisser!

#icantspeakgerman, #butiwantto, #youpisser

meeeoow, aehmpaeh and Loupi4614 like this

I've only got one problem;
take that
Jay-Z!

#99problems?, #pah!

kj55, A.M. and Gabbem like this

Drop
dead
Fred!

#doit

kj55 likes this

I can
wear
what
I want

as long as
I know
who I am!

#beyourself, #you, #me, #love

janem803, kj55, avant-garde and Gabbem like this

you've
gotta
cough,
to get off.

#maryjane, #hightimes

kj55 likes this

#smokeweedeveryday

kj55 and kolarg like this

TWIST IN
MY
SO-----
-----BRI
E-------
------TY

#sobreformonths

Back in the
real world
and time to
be
>>>BOLD<<<
again!

#bebold, #goodtobeback

PenSword72, kj55, aehmpaeh, begrian, lollip2 and foenix like this

Drinking rum in the morning doesn't make you an alcoholic...

It makes you a Pirate!

#uglytruth, #garrrrr

Lady.E, skipp, signesif, kj55, abe and jeve like this

I'm on the Gin & Tonic diet.

So far I've lost 2 days!

#uglytruth, #keepfit

kj55 likes this

Who's up for a moustache
ride?!

#ridewitme

kj55 likes this

"The thing about quotes on the internet is that you can never verify their authenticity."

-Abraham Lincoln

#uglytruth, #truestory

calabrok, Sunshine123, UserOne, knopfimohr, story-of-me, frontliner_311, theobserver, Moon-D, kj55, RamonaStewart and 4 others like this

reposted by kj55, automstic and frontliner_311

Sorry, but your password must contain a capital letter, two numbers,
a symbol, an inspiring message, a spell,
a gang sign,
a hieroglyph and the blood of a virgin.

Reposted from anonymous

#sogood!

BeatMeter, kj55, stefan_noth and swatchUSA like this

When life gives you melons,
you might be dyslexic!

#life, #you, #repost, #melons, #lemons, #love, #fun

juneocallagh, UserOne, DeafLori, kj55 and jeve like this

reposted by DeafLori

Back to reality.
Oops,
there goes
gravity.

#welcomehome, #eminem, #loseyourself, #backtoberlin, #holidayover

Sunshine123, jherd20, kj55, misterlab, avant-garde, aehmpaeh and Gabbem like this

Sometimes I use big words I don't always fully understand in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

Reposted from anonymous

#loveit

kj55, avant-garde and Gabbem like this

The word for
'God'
in Romanian
is
'Devel'.

#justsayin, #interesting, #doubelieve, #isgodeverywhere?

kj55, begrian, SimonLauper, swatchUSA and AJ_Luv like this

You don't
have to
be great
to start,

but you
have to
start to
be great!

#dosomething

jeve, kj55, Gabbem, foenix and begrian like this

Sounds like
you need to
come on
holiday with me to Bali!

@lenamichel, @kj55?, @kj55!

soyy, kj55, brody, avant-garde, abe and lollip2 like this

My
relationship
with
reality?

It
comes
and
goes...

#loseyourself, #you, #me, #believe

kj55, brody, misterlab, begrian, Gabbem and Loupi4614 like this

Deteriorated
by
maturity.

#everythingages

kj55 and brody like this

H O O R A Y!

bold points
. h ;
a
v
e
d
r e a c h e
3 3!
3 3

#smile, #smileyface, #hooray, #celebrate, #bebold, @bold, @boldomatic, #bold

mjf, kj55, bold, misterlab, AJ_Luv, begrian, Gabbem, Loupi4614, avant-garde and swatchUSA like this

You say
that as
if you're
the first
person to
think of it.

#yeahright, #geturheadouturarse, #you

kj55, begrian and abe like this

You can watch things happen, make things happen or just stand there wondering what just happened.

Reposted from IO_N_O

#option3please

kj55 and swatchUSA like this

#wouldulikesomefruit?

kj55, hebdifescht, aehmpaeh and begrian like this

feelin kakky in kahki!

#ihatkahki

Health
is
wealth

#goforarun

kj55 and swatchUSA like this

#mental

kj55 and allisonrae like this

#dirtycash

kj55 likes this

rock out

with your

cock out

#rockinit

kj55 likes this

one tequila
two tequila
three tequila

floor!

#ouch

Sunshine123, PenSword72, annairie, juneocallagh, Convo_Ray, supermom, brody, AJ_Luv, MeMyselfAnd..I, Babs_77 and 5 others like this

reposted by avant-garde and juneocallagh

does anyone fancy chatting at length my new shirt?

#ido

A dad is
someone
who has a
photo where
his money
used to be.

#thanksdad

dor1316, bold, aoibh and lollip2 like this

YOU'RE
NOT
READY
FOR
THIS
ANTI-JOKE!!!

#antijoke, #why, #do, #you, #put, #a, #baby, #head-first, #into, #blender?, #So, #can, #fuck, #it, #while, #dies.

begrian and lollip2 like this

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field!

#antijoke

janem803, swatchUSA and lollip2 like this

Why'd the girl fall off the swing?

Because she had no arms.

#antijoke

Vinyl and lollip2 like this

What's
brown
and
sticky?

A stick.

#antijoke, @lenamichel.

FreeQz, bookwyrm, lovebb201, Belieber1994, lollip2 and Gabbem like this

We may not
have it all
together,
but together
we have it all.

#lets, #stay, #together

kolelo, begrian and lovemychouchou like this

On
it
like
a
hot
bonnet.

#imonit, #igotthis, #hot, #me, #you

hannahe, brody, kj55 and abe like this

All you need is
love,

all you want is
sex...

All you have is
porn!

Reposted from loryane

#pornopower

margaret211, rabbitcarrot, begrian, kj55, Gabbem and beside like this

#cheeky!, #thecheek, #onthecheek, #thisismybuttcheek

abe and kj55 like this

there's always time for a hug!

#freehugs, #life, #hugme, #you, #alwaystimeforyou

janem803, UserOne, rabbitcarrot, abe, foenix, Gabbem, aehmpaeh, begrian and kj55 like this

fantasising about you was the best sex I never had.

#sex, #fantasy, #life, #bold, #you, #love

kj55 and Gabbem like this

who needs clothes when you've got music?!

#musicislife, #letsgetnaked

misterlab, wickedpyxxie, kj55, evvelina, brody and begrian like this

You.
Me.
The woods.
At night.
The stars.
Naked.

Not gonna happen.

#imafraidofthedark

kj55, Gabbem and beesmoove like this

"What did you call me?!"

-Marty McFly

#chicken, #backtothefuture, #zemeckis

kj55 likes this

I feel like
Chicken
Tonight!

#chicken, #tonight, #

brody and kj55 like this

Winner
winner
chicken
dinner!

#chicken, #dinner, #winner

mjf, brody, kj55 and begrian like this

The trick is
boing
something else!

#thailandclassic, #boing!

kj55 and begrian like this

Life was much easier when
Apple
and
Blackberry
were just fruits!

#truth, #thankssteve, #lovemyiphonetho!

kolarg, kj55, Gabbem, begrian and aehmpaeh like this

off to Thailand. See ya later!

#ohhellsyeah!

LOST
My Mind

Reward: Nothing

Please don't
contact me,
I'm happy!

#loseyourmind

misterlab and begrian like this

life
in
Pink
beats
the
birthday
blues!

#boldbirthday, #bepinknotblue, @bold, @boldomatic

misterlab, kj55 and begrian like this

Life is beautiful

#boldbirthday, #lovingthispink!!, #thanks, @bold, @boldomatic

kj55, kolarg and swatchUSA like this

It's not you.
It's everything you're not.

#everythingyourenot, #truthhurts, #boldbirthday, #you, @lenamichel, @Lirpae.., @permanentwaves, @kj55, @_BRODY_, @_BRODY_?!

janem803, Sunshine123, ellenicole, niniel, ikyoulikey, atrano, drubold, halee_price, lollip2, permanentwaves and 8 others like this

reposted by brody, ellenicole and giita

#beautiful, #foul

mjf, kj55, hebdifescht, kolarg, begrian and avant-garde like this

Sex is a sensation
caused by a temptation.
A guy sticks his location, in a girls destination.
To increase population of the next generation.
Do you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?

Reposted from Lirpae..

#brilliant, @Lirpae..

Lirpae.., Gabbem, Stokn, kolarg, kj55 and begrian like this

f
fo
fol
foll
follo
follow
follow m
follow me•

Reposted from anonymous

#coz, #I'm, #pretty, #in, #pink!, @kj55, @kir4s_w0rld

kolarg and kj55 like this

• • • •
• • •
• I LIKE PINK
SMARTIES •
• • •
• • •

#whatswithallthis, #smartie, #talk??, @aehmph, @aehmpaeh, @begrian

brody, Gabbem, kj55, Pesca, begrian and aehmpaeh like this

Wake up
and
smell
the routine!

#wakeup, #timefora, #revolution

brody, bold, kj55 and begrian like this

#boldbirthday, #boredtodeath

Gabbem, kj55, misterlab, kolarg and avant-garde like this

I bought
a battery
pack
for the
Bold Birthday!

#boldbirthday, #damniphone, #boldtilmybatterydies

kj55, swatchUSA and begrian like this

My neighbors liked my music so much they invited the police over to listen to it.

Reposted from NukeSkywalker

#lovedapolice

dor1316, Gabbem, kj55, kolarg, swatchUSA, avant-garde, wickedpyxxie and Stokn like this

MIND
-------------
MATTER

#mindovermatter, #thinkaboutit, #youcandoit

kj55, swatchUSA, avant-garde, begrian and wickedpyxxie like this

Today,
I did yesterday...

I'm so behind.

@bold, @boldomatic, @kj55, @Gabbem, @rabbitcarrot, @Lirpae.., @permanentwaves, @lenamichael, @satan, @God, @tea, #likeit?, #repost?, #whynot?

dor1316, meerstern, rabbitcarrot, Lirpae.., misterlab, tweetybird, begrian, Gabbem, Stokn, permanentwaves and 1 other like this

All I drank was the local ice tea and now I feel like shit. Damn you long island!

Reposted from TravelDexter

#I, #figured, #I'd, #last, #a, #long, #time, #vagrant, #false, #advertising!

UserOne, dor1316, misterlab, wickedpyxxie, kj55, SimonLauper and abe like this

Be BOLD,
or italic, but never
regular!

#boldbirthday, #regularsucks, #boldrules, #happybirthday

UserOne, kj55, misterlab, swatchUSA, Stokn, aehmpaeh, wickedpyxxie and beside like this

damned if
you do

damned if
you don't

#doit, #dontdoit

kj55, bold, _Nathalie_ and permanentwaves like this

reposted by permanentwaves

#animalinstincts, #whatareyou?

ayesha_khn, wickedpyxxie, permanentwaves and kj55 like this

Ever stop to think...

and
forget
to
start
again?!

#iwish, #peaceofmind, #pieceofmind, #peasonmymind

Stokn, permanentwaves, Gabbem and kj55 like this

Well I'm no gynaecologist,

But I'm willing to take a look!

@kj55, @satan, @tea, @permanentwaves, @_BRODY_, @pensword72, @lollip2, @lenamichael, @kolarg, @NukeSkywalker

janem803, misterlab, phuamaxx, Luenchen, Convo_Ray, bienee, Stokn, lollip2, wickedpyxxie, GaylrdSprFckr and 5 others like this

reposted by kj55, CaitlynRenae and hensch

When you're tired of walking,
let beer do the talking!

#beeralwayswins, #beerwalk, #straightlines, #abcd...

rabbitcarrot, kj55, SimonLauper and begrian like this

You're free to join me...
But I'm up to no good!

#doit, #whynot, #c'mon

kj55, Gabbem and begrian like this

Can I stay in your hotel with my Monopoly money?

#whynot?, #monopolyrules

kj55, swatchUSA, Gabbem and begrian like this

Shall I bring my
'get out of jail free' card?

We may need it...

#monopoly, #letscausetrouble, #icanthelpit, #jailsucks, #fuckthepolice, #whodunnit?, @kj55, @permanentwaves, @satan, @misterlab, @tea, @lol

haddock, UserOne, satan, lollip2, kolarg, Gabbem, kj55 and begrian like this

reposted by sarnic78

Yeah, I have a good life...

But as they say, if you can't beat me, join me!

#joinme!, #themorethemerrier, #likeminds, #letshavefun, #playwithme

kj55, Gabbem and begrian like this

I wear my sleeve on my heart.

#huh?, #tryitout

begrian and kj55 like this

Your 1st birthday and your last birthday are usually the same:

someone puts on a party for you with people you don't know, you get presents you don't want or need and you almost certainly poop your pants!!

#boldbirthday, #idontwannagrowup

kj55 likes this

just been road trippin' thru East Europe for a week... visited Prague, Budapest, Bratislava, Vienna, Salzburg and some other little post Cold War style towns!
BUT IT WASN'T UNTIL WE GOT TO BAVARIA THAT WE GOT PULLED OVER BY THE POLICE AND HAD EVERYTHING SEARCHED!!

#wtf?!?!, #fuckdapolice, @kj55!

Gabbem, swatchUSA, kj55 and begrian like this

I'm so happy with these nuts in my mouth!

#ilovem&mpeanuts!

phuamaxx, Luenchen, niemo, Gabbem, allisonkay, abe, lollip2, kj55 and begrian like this

reposted by hensch

Not
all
who
wander
are
lost...

#roamtheearth, #lostwanderers, #getlost, @misterlab.

Convo_Ray, Gabbem, allisonkay, kolarg, wickedpyxxie, satan, abe, lollip2, kj55, swatchUSA and 1 other like this

reposted by Convo_Ray

#pocketrocket

allisonkay, wickedpyxxie, satan, abe, lollip2 and kj55 like this

#saywhaaaaaat?, #swapsies

kj55, Gabbem and allisonrae like this

silly twits ignore their mitts.

#dontbesilly

kj55, White_Sheep17 and begrian like this

it's true alcohol kills people. but how many are born because of it?

Reposted from avant-garde

#giveandtake, #baby!

kj55, Gabbem, permanentwaves, avant-garde and begrian like this

Never look down at someone unless you're helping them up.

Reposted from guggigirl

#equalityrocks

kj55 and Gabbem like this

Is it just me, or do mirrors look really sexy?

Reposted from anonymous

#preach

Gabbem, kj55 and beesmoove like this

(__You'll never get__)
(__to Heaven__)
(__________)
high!
getting
of
afraid
you're
If

#highwaytoheaven

kj55, begrian, wickedpyxxie and allisonrae like this

Hit me
with
My City
sticks!

#mycity

kj55 likes this

Me and my city have a love/hate relationship...

When I hit the town,
My City hits back!

#mycity

kj55, satan, Stokn, brody and aehmpaeh like this

May all your ups and downs be between the sheets.

Reposted from mearon

#happyhumping

kj55, Stokn and lollip2 like this

wisdom takes experience takes time
takes patience takes humility
which takes
wisdom!

#thistakesthat

niniel, kj55, brody and begrian like this

I used to do drugs...

I still do,
I just used to as well.

#drugs, #are, #bad, #mmmmkay!!, #mmmkay

kj55, brody, kolarg, bold and begrian like this

Thailand:
Booked!

#boom!, @lenamichael

kj55 likes this

You ain't cool, unless you pee your pants!

#billymadison, #if, #peeing, #your, #pants, #is, #cool, #consider, #me, #mylesdavis!, #doit!

n.schi and kj55 like this

don't big time in my bathroom!

#just, #said, #that, #to, #a, #friend, #lovemylife!, #life

kj55, brody and lollip2 like this

Cold
Cocaine
Condoms
Codependancy...

How come thinks
starting with 'co'
make the dick
shrink?!

#wheresmyoldmate?, #wtf, #cool, #communication!, #bold, #shithappens, #funny, #boysrule, #haha

beautiful, lollip2 and kj55 like this

My fake plants died because I didn't pretend to water them!

#plasticfantastic, #wateryourplants, #fakeisbaked, #dead, #life, #bold, #fun

bold, kj55, Stokn, Gabbem, misterlab and SimonLauper like this

My city is
Planet
Earth!

#mycity, #planetearth

kj55, SimonLauper and swatchUSA like this

I was born in Adelaide, grew up in the Gold Coast, moved to Tokyo when I was 18, then moved to London when I was 21, have lived in 5 different countries, 8 different cities, a few towns...
MY city is Planet Earth!

#mycity

kj55, brody, Gabbem, beesmoove and swatchUSA like this

I can wear what I want

as long as I know who I am.

#knowyourself, #wearwhatyouwant

Stokn and kj55 like this

There's nothing scarier than the split second where you lose your balance in the shower and think "oh god, they're going to find me naked"

Reposted from anonymous

#whatwillmymumthink?

misterlab, Gabbem, bold and kj55 like this

Work for a cause,
not for applause.
Live life to express,
not to impress.
Don't strive to make your presence
noticed,
just make your absence felt.

#life

allisonrae, permanentwaves, White_Sheep17, kj55 and Gabbem like this

Worrying is like a rocking chair...

It'll give you something to do
for a while,
but it won't get you anywhere!

#wasteoftime, #livelife, #life, #worrying, #dontworrybehappy, @kj55, @Lirpae.., @hannahe, #havefun

permanentwaves, aoibh, hannahe, bold, Gabbem, Stokn, allisonkay, swatchUSA, Lirpae.. and kj55 like this

#help, #thebeatles, #bold

kj55, aoibh, allisonkay and swatchUSA like this

I've got me 1169 Bold points...
That's 1 and 1 doing a 69.
Win!

#proudtobebold, #whatdothesepointsdo?, #whoscounting?!, #69, #yesimimmature!

Gabbem, Jamille, kj55, wickedpyxxie, misterlab and scorpiogirl like this

@permanentwaves, #whatever, #likewhatever, #liketotally, #totally

kj55, wickedpyxxie, misterlab, allisonkay, swatchUSA and permanentwaves like this

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

Reposted from bold

#I, #have, #the, #answer!

niniel, kj55, misterlab, allisonkay, Stokn and bold like this

Don't take
life too
seriously,

you'll never
get out alive!

#life, #livefree, #livetolove, #lovetolive., #For, #my, #new, #followers:, @A.M., @wickedpyxxie, @evvelina, @philthy69, @_BRODY_, @allisonkay

UserOne, kj55, misterlab, allisonkay, evvelina, SimonLauper, hebdifescht, A.M., wickedpyxxie and bold like this

•FIG JAM•

fuck I'm good,
just ask me.

#figjam, #figjambaby!, #justaskme, #bold, #fun, #fig, #jam, @kj55, @permanentwaves, @swatchUSA, #arrogantmuch??, #ha, @satan

satan, bold, wickedpyxxie, kj55 and permanentwaves like this

reposted by satan

Skate

or

Die!

#skateordie, #nevergrowup, #kidatheart

scorpiogirl, beesmoove and swatchUSA like this

"Dad, can I borrow a condom?"
"Why?"
"I need protection, Dad."
"Surely your face is protection enough?!"
Happy Halloween!

#thanksdad, #halloween, #niceface, #youreuglyson, #loveyou

kj55, Gabbem, brody, A.M. and bold like this

I'm
Rich
Jay
bitch!

#rickjames, #davechappele, #imrichjaybitch, #thatsmynameyo!, #dontbehatin, #youwishyouwererich, #haha, #funny, #bold, #cocaine, #lol

brody, allisonkay and kj55 like this

little bit of liquid
confidence...

and
AWAY
I GO!

#beerisgood, #beer, #getready

janem803, dor1316, mjf, allisonkay and kj55 like this

If there's wifi in Hell,
I'm gonna be extra tricky this Halloween!

#halloween

kj55 and Stokn like this

Sex,
drugs
&
sausage rolls

#perfectsunday, #sexdrugsandrocknroll, #modernrock, #feedme, #dontdodrugs, #life

kj55 and beesmoove like this

#halloween, #isthistherightcomp?, #amilate?, #didimisssomething?, #imagine!, #witches, #ain't, #nothin, #but, #tricks, #and, #hos, @kj55, @ko

PenSword72, wickedpyxxie, kolarg, kj55 and beesmoove like this

Shoot for the moon•
* * *
*
* *
* * *
* *
e v e n i f y o u *
m i s s y o u ' l l *
l a n d *
s o m e w h e r e *
a m o n g t h e *
s t a r s. * *

#shootforthemoon, #youreastar, #superstar, #supernova, #outtathisworld, #aimhigh, #gethigh, #thinkbig, #livelife, @lirpae, @kj55, @hannahe,

janem803, Sunshine123, UserOne, agneymenon, annairie, juneocallagh, Convo_Ray, avant-garde, Junomea, wickedpyxxie and 7 others like this

reposted by brody, juneocallagh and agneymenon

I'm an alpha male
on beta-blockers.

#oldschool

kj55, hannahe, kolarg and lollip2 like this

Pobody's
Nerfect!

#nobodysperfect, #pobodysnerfect, #dontlookatme, #woops, #bold, #boldlife, #livebold

MaScho, tjes, wickedpyxxie, kolarg, hannahe, swatchUSA, scorpiogirl, kj55 and Laurahagebutte like this

Don't drink and drive.

Smoke and fly.

Reposted from Laurahagebutte

#drivetosurvive

hannahe, scorpiogirl, swatchUSA, White_Sheep17 and Laurahagebutte like this

Why don't skeletons like parties?

They have no body to dance with!

#halloween, #skeletongotnofriends

fuechsin, igrette, kj55 and satan like this

Demons
are a
ghoul's
best
friend!

#halloween, #diamondsontheinside

kj55 likes this

you can pick
your friends,

and you can pick
your nose,

but you can't pick your friends' nose!

@kj55, #goldenruleoflife, #howtosurvive, #lifeadvice, #life, #pick, #bold

mjf, kj55, kolarg and aehmpaeh like this

<----
rEVOLution

#love, #lover, #evol, #revolution, #revolt, #revoltinlove, #loveit, #loveyou, #loveme, #livetolove, #lovetolive, #backwardslove

kj55, kolarg and lovemychouchou like this

There is a special place in he'll for autocorrect

Reposted from anonymous

#iloveapples, #thefruitthatis!

soyy, allisonrae, beesmoove, hannahe, bold, GaylrdSprFckr, kolarg, sarcaSM, kj55 and stefan_noth like this

...it was the best of times,
it was the blurst of times...

#simpsons, #mrburns, #monkeyonatypewriter, #monkeysee, #monkeydo, #seehearspeak, #noevil, #thesimpsons, #bold, #boldhumour, #yes, #90s

GaylrdSprFckr, sarcaSM and kj55 like this

Bold,
sweat
&
tears.

@kj55, @PenSword72, @lirpae, @permanentwaves, @aehmpaeh, @JoiJetson, @stefan_noth, @roel, @lollip2, #I'm, #new, #here, #but, #I, #love, #being,

JoiJetson, lollip2, kj55, aehmpaeh, stefan_noth and PenSword72 like this

Dwarf
shortage!

#twowordjoke, #dwarfshortage, #punisfun, #takeiteasy, #funny, #bold

Andrix018, hannahe, GaylrdSprFckr, Stokn, kj55 and scorpiogirl like this

give
Tea
some
peace.

@tea, #hopethishelps, #givepeaceachance, #teaandpeace, #peacetea, #peacetreaty, #fancyacuppa, #bold, #boo, @Tea!

abe, swatchUSA, lollip2, PenSword72, tweetybird, rabbitcarrot and kj55 like this

haikus are easy,
but sometimes they don't make sense,
refrigerator.

#haiku, #refrigerator, #nonsense, #whoneedssense, #easy, #life, #me, #you, #go, #bold, #cool

janem803, Campo, Sunshine123, allisonrae, cwistimbo, wickedpyxxie, hannahe, Samwell, aoibh, sarcaSM and 4 others like this

reposted by sarcaSM

Everything will be
alright in the end.

If it's not yet alright, then it's not yet the end.

#everythingsfine, #everythingwillbeok, #itsallgood, #trustme, #philosophy, #life, #you, #me, #believe, #havefaith, #faith, #bold, #cool

rabbitcarrot and kj55 like this

you can't
find your mind

if
you
don't
lose
it
first.

#loseyourmind, #losetheplot, #lostmymind, #findyourmind, #life, #mind, #bold, #you, #me, #mymind, #whereismymind?, @aehmpaeh, @kj55, @permane

wickedpyxxie, swatchUSA, permanentwaves, kj55 and aehmpaeh like this

Homeless
romantic.

#hopeless, #homeless, #homelessromantic, #hopelessromantic, #iloveyou, #you, #me, #love, #life, #bold, #new

PenSword72, permanentwaves and kj55 like this

pull down your pants

and fertalise the plants.

#whynot, #imaman, #ilovebeingaman, #pee, #life, #gogreen, #bold, #different

lollip2 and kj55 like this

I'm in a Jamaican band. I play the triangle. I stand at the back and ting.

Reposted from anonymous

#jamaicanmecrazy

kj55 and hannahe like this

I'm
too
big
to
fail.

#toobigtofail, #look, #at, #me, #failure, #is, #not, #an, #option, #whatdoesitmean, #bold, #cool, #life, #you

GaylrdSprFckr, satan, tweetybird, kj55, aehmpaeh, SimonLauper and scorpiogirl like this

These boots were made for stalking...

#stalkme, #stalkboots, #fuckmeboots, #theseboots, #bold, #bolder!

kj55 and SimonLauper like this

Surely there's something you can do something.

#doit, #surely, #somethingtodo, #canudosomething, #dosomething, #bold

kj55 likes this

I hope Jessica Biel names her first child Batmo.

Reposted from satan

#classic

hannahe, satan, kj55 and SimonLauper like this

Carpe Scrotum

Grab life by the balls!

Reposted from misterlab

#squeeeeeze

GaylrdSprFckr, satan, kj55 and Stokn like this

once you go black, you never go back.

once you go white, you better put up
with that shite!

#truth

mjf and kj55 like this

shite
bright
like
a
diamond!

#rihanna, #shinebright, #shite, #shineshite, #diamonds, #are, #a, #girls, #best, #friend, #cool, #bold

Stokn and kj55 like this

Relationships
without sex
are like happy
meals without
toys •

Reposted from Lirpae..

#illshowumine, #ifyoushowmeyours

hannahe, Lirpae.. and kj55 like this

k k !
a a m
b b o
k a b o o m !
b o o
a m m
k ! !

#kaboom, #jiminyjillikers, #batman, #60s, #boom, #bomb, #dabomb, #timesrunningout, @permanentwaves, @kj55, #whynot?

naebitnae, Fionacatherine, itchyPitchfork, Sunshine123, upupandaway, Vandtastic, Gabbem, Lirpae.., aehmpaeh, Doniiiih and 21 others like this

reposted by permanentwaves, kj55, aehmpaeh, aehmpaeh and itchyPitchfork

Feat.
Your
Self

#featuringyou, #guestofguests, #thebestguest, #immyownstar, #beproud, #cool, #bold, #newmusic

kj55 likes this

Did
we
just
become
best
friends?!

#stepbrothers, #willferral, #johncreilly, #bffs, #brosbeforehoes, #matesbeforedates, #dudesbeforeprudes, @permanentwaves, @hannahe

ellenicole, hannahe, kj55 and permanentwaves like this

Stick a fork in me,
I'm done.

#imdone, #mediumrare, #forkme

Reposted from permanentwaves

#gravitysabitch, #whatsupg?, #theresagontheroof

satan, permanentwaves and swatchUSA like this

i put the "ill" in illiterate

Reposted from permanentwaves

permanentwaves likes this

Sometimes I work.

Sometimes I play.

Sometimes I like
to do it all day!

#sometimes, #doit, #iliketoworkit, #workrestplay, #doitallday

kj55 likes this

I like you
like
it.

#ilikeyou, #ilikeyoulikeit

GaylrdSprFckr, swatchUSA and kj55 like this

Arrest yourself!

#arrestyourself, #yourewrong, #getout, #hotchip, #gostraighttojail, @kj55

PUSSY and kj55 like this

#safetyfirst, #safetymeeting, #staysafe, @kj55

kj55 likes this

Human
Resources.

Otherwise known as:
Lady Sciences.

#hr, #humanresources, #ladysciences, #unnecessary, #loveyourjob, #bold, #fun, #funny, #lol

Stokn and permanentwaves like this

What if birds aren't singing when they fly...

they're actually screaming coz they're afraid of heights?!

#birds, #fly, #singingbirds, #birdsofafeather, #screamingbirds, #fun, #funny, #cool, #bold, #hi

millemusen12, ngan, kathiheger, hannahe, kj55 and SimonLauper like this

When I own my own pub, I'm gonna call it
'The Gym',
so us guys can say...

"Don't worry, hunny. I'm just off to The Gym!"

#thegym, #publife, #dontworryhunny, #goodexcuse, #man, #manlyman

Convo_Ray, hannahe, Luenchen, lollip2, satan, Stokn and kj55 like this

reposted by satan

bonk

my backwards

knob

#canuseeit, #bonkknob, #knobbonk, #itsbackwards!, #fun, #funny, #shit, #shitty, #cool, #bold

mjf and kj55 like this

I'm
easy,
not
sleasy!

#easynotsleasy, #imeasy, #imnotsleasy, #sexy, #cool, #fun, #bold

kj55 likes this

I am the captain of your heart.

#captain, #heart, #love, #loveboat, #letsgetlost

Laurahagebutte and kj55 like this

allow me to finger your tea with some rum!

#letsgetpissed, #teatime, #tea, #spiked!, #allowme, #cool, #fun, #bold

kj55 likes this

product

Now, where did I place my...?

#productplacement

maudapena, swatchUSA and kj55 like this

"How
now
brown
cow?"

#hownow, #elocutionlessons, #speakproperly, #practicemakesperfect, #saywhat, #wtf, #cool, #bold

hannahe and kj55 like this

I got
99 problems but bein' Rich ain't one!

#mynameisrich, #imrichjaybitch, #richjaybitch, #99problems, #jayz, #mybitch, #rappersdelight

permanentwaves and kj55 like this

who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?!

#whodidit, #cookie, #cookiejar, #whodunnit, #cookietime!, #cool, #bold, #bebold, #bolder

kj55 likes this

sleep
when
you're
dead!

#sleep, #dead, #stayalive, #stayinalive, #party, #cool, #bold, #bebold, #bolder

kj55 likes this

flow
with
the
go

#flowwiththego, #gowiththeflow, #cool, #bold, #bebold, #bolder, #takeiteasy, #smooth, #easylivin

kj55 likes this

it ain't easy

being cheesy!

#cheese, #saycheese, #cool, #easypeasy, #cheesy, #bold, #bebold

Stokn and kj55 like this

$it's a :\>DOS life$

#itsadoslife, #dos, #c, #computergeek, #computergames, #runlife, #itsadogslife, #doyagetit?

Stokn and kj55 like this

Roses are
grey,
violets are grey, everything is grey,
I'm a dog.

#dogs, #only, #see, #in, #blackandwhite, #greyworld, #dogslife, #poeticinjustice

PenSword72, hannahe and kj55 like this

#beyounique, #beunique, #unique, #beyourself, #true, #truth, #honesty, #beyou, #you

hannahe, Pesca, permanentwaves, satan, PenSword72 and kj55 like this

reposted by cora.steffani

If it don't apply...

Let it fly!

#letitfly, #fly, #dontapply, #stressless, #staycool, #itdontmatter, #beyourself, #cool

kj55 likes this

Torn
between
spandex
and
satin.

#spandex, #satin, #torn, #toughdecision, #firstworldproblems

kj55 likes this

t o t a l l y
s p a c e d
o u t

#spaced, #spacedout, #imondrugs, #livelavidaloca, #pun, #getspaced

Stokn and kj55 like this

I like your mess.

#messy

PenSword72 and kj55 like this

Let me tell you a bit about my background...

Well, It's green.

#history, #background, #greeniscool, #dadjoke, #repost, #share, #itshiptobesquare, @boldomatic, @bold

siouxz, sirskitten1, janem803, Lieutenant, meohmy, Sunshine123, UserOne, curvema, MM_Mim, bienee and 32 others like this

reposted by kj55, kimmie34, beccy, makedonikos, Boldomatic, ajslexi, raffizh, curlydounia, TayCee13, casoslo and 5 others

Before facebook, I never knew how competitive...

being social is. (like) (share) (block)

#facebook, #share, #social, #socialmedia, #competitivefriends, #likeme, #coolkids

kj55 likes this

I dream of you in colours that don't even exist.

#love, #dream, #dreamer, #colours, #romance, #daydream, #daydreamer, #loveyou

Sunshine123, hannahe, Pesca and kj55 like this

I'm so drunk I can't see my face!

#drunk, #letsparty, #party, #partytime, #differentperspective

PenSword72, kj55, satan and Babs_77 like this