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i would like to change the world too ; but there's not a diaper big enough to do the job .
Your future self is watching you through memories.
"Told you so" Sincerely, your intuition
Wherever I go, my heart is with you.
A condom would have prevented this post.
The best feeling is when someone appreciates everything about you that someone else took for granted
/ ` \      . - ' ' - .      \  |  /      \      / /    |   |    / /       \   _ . '    \ `- - - -. '  ' . _   /'''\      ` - - .           \  \ . ' |         /        /\  \ / './.'        /        /  \  ` /.' .'       |        / __  ` - - '. , ' , '       |    _     ` \ , ' b ' . \ \ ' - - . | . ' ,' , b. | | | | , b , ' ,
We don't have to get along. But, we don't have to hurt each other, either. 
When your "mom voice" is so loud that even your neighbors brush their teeth and get dressed
despite the cost of living, it's still popular.
I'm friendly, but it isn't easy to be my friend
Not every entry is a way in.
If the earth was flat, the cats would have pushed everything off it by now.
\ I / -- O -- / I \ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ | | | | | | | \ | | | _ _| | | | | | | | \ | | | |_ _ | | | | | | | \I | | _| | |_ | | | | _ | | | |\ | | |_ _ | _ _ _ | |_ _ _ _ | |_ | \ _ | | _ _ _|
i think, therefore... i could be horribly wrong.
i miss you all the time because i wanna feel the warmth of your physical body that i feel in my heart
Febreze saved my relationship once.
I like my legs wrapped around yours
Old ways don't open new doors!
Drink like no one's dancing
Keep bikers safe ••• Don't show them your boobs until they have come to a complete stop !
Life is like a box of wine, you never know how much you have left....
WE HAVE NO RIGHT TO ASK WHEN SORROW COMES, WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO ME? UNLESS WE ASK THE SAME QUESTION FOR EVERY MOMENT OF HAPPINESS THAT COMES OUR WAY.
Some of these things hurt me to write, but they crush me if I keep them in....
Your future self is watching you through memories.
When your "mom voice" is so loud that even your neighbors brush their teeth and get dressed
I apologize for undressing your Bolds with my teeth.
i think, therefore... i could be horribly wrong.
when love finds you, let it go, give it to others who seem poor in spirit, give it to the world around you in any way you can •••
I didn't choose. It just happened.
When everyone else is talking about going to heaven but you're focused on getting your soul right for the 5th dimension.
I think Hell is something you carry around with you. . . Not somewhere you go.
Most people are OK when they're OK.
Whoever snuck the 's' into 'fast food' was a clever bastard.
We go together like pineapple and rum
It's a fact, if they find the truth. If they dont, Just saying.
When you've hit rock bottom and survived, there are few things in life that can scare you.
there's a world outside your window
No man knows how bad he really is until he's tried very hard to be good.
Der Grund meiner schlaflosen Nächte manifestiert sich äußerst positiv, denn das bist du
'ICH KENNE SIE ALLE OHNE BH.' RAINER, 36, DHL BOTE.
IT COULD BE WORSE
Online dating. "It turns out, women really care about men's height. Im 59”, if I wanted to be as attractive as somebody whos 510”, right, another inch? I would have to make about $35-40,000 more a year." Justsaying
Is there a difference between creative expression and showing off?
Eine wilde Welle wogte eine Weile mit dem Winde auf dem weiten Meer, wiegte wütend sich mit jeder Woge einer winzig kleinen Welle hinterher. Denn die wilde Welle wollte wohl so gerne ohne diese kleine Welle sein, ohne Wind&all die and'ren Wellen, in der Wasserwüste - ganz allein. Warum woll'n wir nicht gemeinsam wogen? wand die kleine Welle leise weinend ein. Schau der Wind&all die weißen Wolken wandern auch gemeinsam in die Welt hinein. Wäre es nicht eine Wohltat,wenn wir wüssten, wir sind nicht allein?!? Wohl wahr! erwiederte die wilde Welle &schlug wütend auf die kleine Welle ein!
fidget benefits
Suck it like your ex is watching.
fringe spinner
It's not illegal. It's just frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.
laundry today or naked tomorrow
You look like something I draw with my left hand.
There is a big difference between a guy and a girl saying, "I went through an entire box of tissues during that movie."
My internet was down for 5 minutes so I went downstairs and spoke to my family. They seem like nice people.
Whenever I delete an app on my phone, the shaking icons make me feel like they're all panicked over who's getting axed •
I HOPE YOUR DAY IS AS NICE AS YOUR BUTT
My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"
LISTEN TO SILENCE
If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything
I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.
If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself
Voices in your head - normal Listening to them - common Arguing with them - acceptable Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM
i just burnt my tongue on some food they say the ones you love hurt you the most
THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.
justice is a beautiful concept. unicorns too.
others have sex in the kitchen, I eat in bed
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.
Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.
Sun goes down earlier for short people.
If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.
I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty and I could not have described it any better
i've fallen in love with you, but you don't exist.
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