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Bring back Boldomatic to the App Store, please. Santa, that's my only wish this year.
Do whatever the fuck you want. Just don't hurt other people.
Some people only talk about you because they lost the privilege to talk to you.
Does anyone know where @karlokoenig is?
I'm So Old That... I have dialed a rotary phone, listened to music off an 8-track tape, watched a black and white TV with foil on the rabbit ear antennas, and went through a whole day without taking a picture of myself.
Far too many people are ashamed of their bodies and far too few of their character ...
What makes you human?? ''To love and care for others?'' No, selecting all images with traffic lights!
WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER HERO
I accept that the only path beyond suffering is to give up everything.
where is @buzzielizzy?
The more you love yourself, the more you'll detach from the things that don't love you.
I've been too busy, Fannying about all day, To do objectives.
Sometimes change is just what you need.
how many alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? to get to the other side.
Sandals with socks is a game changer
Be the parent you wish you had
die nacht hat mit mir durchgemacht.
I'm fat but I identify as slim. I'm a transslender.
NOTE TO SELF: JUST BECAUSE IT POPS INTO MY HEAD DOES NOT MEAN IT SHOULD COME OUT FOR A BOLD.
Dating when you're older, is like finding a shopping cart with good wheels at Walmart.
ladies, if you want closure in your relationship, start with your legs.
I am sorry, (not) that my eyes said 'Oh no, not you again! Even if my lying lips seemed smiling.
My problem isn't that I hear what you're saying but that I can see what you're doing
You were simply the best!
Bring back Boldomatic to the App Store, please. Santa, that's my only wish this year.
it's harder to live when those we love are dead
where is @buzzielizzy?
I'm fat but I identify as slim. I'm a transslender.
What are you passionate enough about that you can endure the most disagreeable aspects of the work?
friendship is the shadow of love
I don't read newspapers anymore - I just lie to myself and cut out the middleman.
No man should be in a woman's prison no matter how he feels
to get closer to God, I left His church
Felinetrovert: people who prefer the company of cats to people
We are not the same.
I want to do the sex thing again.
it's not that I don't like other people, it's that I don't need them
my next hobby, sensitivity reader at Boldomatic
To make me happy: Make me coffee, bring me coffee, be coffee ... coffee.
How can you find out if someone is a vegan? Just wait a couple of seconds and they'll tell you.
You are not separate from anything or anyone.
Reality is no longer guaranteed beyond this point.
I am sorry, (not) that my eyes said 'Oh no, not you again! Even if my lying lips seemed smiling.
are we there yet
bad rabbits can be broken
I seriously need a good fucking from something other than life.
if video games are supposed to allow you to do things you do not do in real life, stop with the games with characters running from mass shooters, dying from strange diseases or stalked by sketchy UFO's, war and shit; we have enough of reality already
Living your Daydream
It's not illegal. It's just frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.
laundry today or naked tomorrow
You look like something I draw with my left hand.
There is a big difference between a guy and a girl saying, "I went through an entire box of tissues during that movie."
Whenever I delete an app on my phone, the shaking icons make me feel like they're all panicked over who's getting axed •
My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"
I HOPE YOUR DAY IS AS NICE AS YOUR BUTT
If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
LISTEN TO SILENCE
With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything
I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.
If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself
Voices in your head - normal Listening to them - common Arguing with them - acceptable Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM
i just burnt my tongue on some food they say the ones you love hurt you the most
THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.
Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.
Sun goes down earlier for short people.
If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.
justice is a beautiful concept. unicorns too.
I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty and I could not have described it any better
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.
10% of conflicts are due to differences in opinion. 90% are due to wrong tone of voice.
I like to be alone. But I would rather be alone with you.
i've fallen in love with you, but you don't exist.
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