visorvice's Posts

if nobody from the future comes to stop you how bad can the decision really be?

Reposted from jay36017

if nobody from the future comes to stop you how bad can the decision really be?

Reposted from jay36017

if nobody from the future comes to stop you how bad can the decision really be?

Reposted from jay36017

Good people age better.

Reposted from foodLoverChef

crafty and janem803 like this

One of the greatest paradoxes of your physical senses is that your eyes show you what you believe, not what you see.

Reposted from damon.lindsay2

crafty, CityCharacter, beingme and locupleto like this

The key to eating healthy?

Avoid any food that has a TV commercial.

Reposted from blackboxmagic

GreatSmile and InfluenceNoise like this

It's just a matter of time

before they add the word "syndrome" after my name.

Reposted from UserOne

crafty, UserOne, GreatSmile, InfluenceNoise and janem803 like this

I'M AFRAID IF I GIVE UP SARCASM,
I WOULD HAVE TO REPLACE IT WITH MURDER.

Reposted from juneocallagh

InfluenceNoise likes this

I'VE DECIDED TO LEAVE MY PAST BEHIND ME, SO IF I OWE YOU MONEY.....
I'M SORRY BUT I'VE MOVED ON ;-))

Reposted from juneocallagh

The first 40 years

of childhood are
always the hardest.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne, InfluenceNoise and janem803 like this

"You would do it if you loved me."

Me: "Sounds like the beginning of abuse."

Reposted from Ziya

InfluenceNoise and janem803 like this

I'm trending in my
own mind

Reposted from Fionacatherine

InfluenceNoise and sudeshnarocks like this

i fully intended to behave but there were to many options .

Reposted from anonymous

InfluenceNoise, janem803 and sudeshnarocks like this

Handle every stressful situation like a dog.

If you can't eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.

Reposted from guggigirl

InfluenceNoise and sudeshnarocks like this

Reality is only one of many characters competing for screentime in my mind.

Reposted from Acataphasja

sudeshnarocks, juneocallagh, janem803 and InfluenceNoise like this

If people are doubting how far you can go,

go so far that you can't hear them any more.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne, locupleto, InfluenceNoise and janem803 like this

People who ask me what I'm doing tomorrow probably assume i even know what day of the week it is.

Reposted from Bettydent

InfluenceNoise likes this

People who ask me what I'm doing tomorrow probably assume i even know what day of the week it is.

Reposted from Bettydent

InfluenceNoise likes this

Inhale confidence
Exhale doubt

Reposted from Fionacatherine

InfluenceNoise, visorvice and janem803 like this

Fart when people hug you.

It makes them feel strong.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne, InfluenceNoise and janem803 like this

SHE SAID YES :D

#yes, #awesome

InfluenceNoise and janem803 like this

Everything is amazing and nobody is happy.

Reposted from daniel8a14

InfluenceNoise, juneocallagh and locupleto like this

WE SHOULD START REFERRING TO " AGE"
AS " LEVELS",
BECAUSE I'M AT LEVEL "80"

SOUNDS COOLER !

Reposted from juneocallagh

Sasquatchprime, InfluenceNoise, locupleto and janem803 like this

sleep - the world is quiet but the thoughts aren't

Reposted from anonymous

janem803, InfluenceNoise and sudeshnarocks like this

Some people are wise, others are otherwise...

Reposted from sudeshnarocks

janem803 and sudeshnarocks like this

If you're in a relationship and all you do is cry,
you have to ask yourself,

are you dating a human, or an onion.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne and InfluenceNoise like this

IT'S GETTING REALLY ANNOYING HOW EATING MAKES YOU GAIN WEIGHT!

Reposted from juneocallagh

janem803 and InfluenceNoise like this

When did you realise that you've grown up and your parents have become old?
I realised tonight when my dad complained that he wanted an ice-cream again and again, so we went down to find him one post dinner...

Reposted from sudeshnarocks

janem803 and sudeshnarocks like this

It is important to feel the anger without judging it, without attempting to find meaning in it. It may take many forms: anger at the health-care system, at life, at your loved one for leaving. Life is unfair. Death is unfair. Anger is a natural reaction to the unfairness of loss.
~ Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne, CityCharacter, beingme and locupleto like this

I did the best I could with what little I could tolerate at the time.

Reposted from Authlander

janem803, locupleto, Authlander and juneocallagh like this

My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"

Reposted from Nanoolsen

InfluenceNoise and NerdWord like this

Mondays are fine.

It's your life that sucks.

Reposted from Sunshine123

Sunshine123, InfluenceNoise and NerdWord like this

Wisdom is like a compass in the dark. You know it's pointing in the right direction, but you just can't see it, yet.

Reposted from Ziya

InfluenceNoise and NerdWord like this

Don't
Be
Eye yum
Candy yum
Be yum
Soul
Food

Reposted from NerdWord

InfluenceNoise likes this

I suffer from that disorder where i speak the truth and it pisses people off.

Reposted from Bettydent

People write because no one listens.

Reposted from firoz0089

InfluenceNoise, janem803 and locupleto like this

They'll criticize you anyway
So do whatever
feels right
to you
You'll be damned
if you do
And if you don't

Reposted from BirthIntention

janem803, CityCharacter and NerdWord like this

The world is one big lie.

There's nothing super in this supermarket.

Reposted from sarcaSM

NerdWord likes this

brother: hey, if i cut off my foot and swing it at your head am i kicking or hitting you?

me: you'll most likely mentally scar me more than anything.

Reposted from jaybyrd

janem803 likes this

I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

(Unknown)

Reposted from KnightofSIAL

KnightofSIAL, janem803 and beingme like this

Whatever doesn't kill me makes me like "Whoa, that was close"!

Reposted from misterlab

KnightofSIAL, janem803, NerdWord, misterlab and beingme like this

Some call it multi-tasking

I call it doing something else while i try to remember what i was doing in the first place

Reposted from Bettydent

NerdWord and beingme like this

SHOUTOUT
TO
EVERYONE

WHO GOT THROUGH THE DAY WITHOUT TAKING A NAP

Pulled an all-dayer today
Pretty rough

Reposted from Bettydent

janem803, NerdWord and beingme like this

For the real question is whether the brighter future is really always so distant. What if, on the contrary, it has been here for a long time already, and only our own blindness and weakness has prevented us from seeing it around us and within us, and kept us from developing it?

Reposted from Authlander

beingme and Authlander like this

LAZY RULE:

CAN'T REACH IT,
DON'T NEED IT.

Reposted from juneocallagh

janem803 and petegutz2 like this

the true loss of innocence is when you realize that you have to pick a path and stay on it in order to get anywhere in life.

Reposted from locupleto

janem803 and locupleto like this

I think I'm approaching my "Best before" date.

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa and petegutz2 like this

"don't ask me again" is my favorite computer option that I wish I could apply to real people

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

janem803 and beingme like this

When I was 10 I lived in many worlds. Some had dragons, some had aliens, some had superheroes, all were fantastical and limited only by our imaginations.

Now I live in this one and it's full of shitheads.

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

beingme likes this

Hug the people you hate.

It helps to let you know how big to dig the hole in the backyard

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

janem803 and beingme like this

Try to live in the present.

That moment you just read that is no longer happening, this one is. Oops, you missed that one too.

Damn, you suck at this.

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

beingme likes this

Laugh and the world laughs with you, continue laughing and the world slowly trails off to silence, continue laughing further and people start to stare at you with concern and slowly back away

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

beingme likes this

My Christmas list is short this year:

1. $1,000,000,000 cash
2. The souls of all who have displeased me
3. chocolate

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

Someday I'm going to eyeroll myself into another dimensiom

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

beingme likes this

When someone says that they did something "like a boss" I assume they didn't do it all and are merely taking credit for it.

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

Uhm, how do we know all the Greek statues aren't just victims of Medusa?

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

Bigfoot saw me but nobody believes him

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

"When you read a line that is so well-written you just close the book and stare at the wall for a minute."

Reposted from Acataphasja

beingme and locupleto like this

I may have spent too much time with myself. Because at times even we don't get along...

Reposted from wizeoldsoul

I dont believe I am always totally negative... I just don't try to be unrealistic!

Reposted from wizeoldsoul

When life gives you melons...
You might be dyslexic.

Reposted from wizeoldsoul

locupleto likes this

How many times do i have to say 'excuse me'
before 'get the fuck out of my way ' becomes acceptable ?

Reposted from Bettydent

janem803 likes this

we are very good at preparing to live, but not very good at living.

we know how to sacrifice decades of our lives to get diplomas, jobs, cars and houses... but we forget that we are alive only in the present moment.

let us enjoy our now,... now.

Reposted from locupleto

locupleto and janem803 like this

you decide whether you're alone or by yourself.

it's just two different places in your head for the same thing.

Reposted from locupleto

locupleto, janem803 and NerdWord like this

every moment of our lives is new; we are always in the midst of the new and unknown;

yet most of us spend our lives resisting that fact, creating unnecessary anxiety along the way.

Reposted from locupleto

locupleto, janem803 and NerdWord like this

the older I get, the further from 100% sure I am of anything.

Reposted from locupleto

locupleto and NerdWord like this

[THE INVENTION OF KNOCKING]

I'M GONNA PUNCH YOUR HOUSE UNTIL YOU TALK TO ME .

Reposted from juneocallagh

janem803 and juneocallagh like this

“Go to bed, you'll feel better tomorrow” is the human version of “Did you try turning it off and back on again?”

Reposted from ErikSmit

juneocallagh, beingme, ErikSmit and janem803 like this

If you're not having fun, then what's the fucking point?

Reposted from Ziya

beingme and janem803 like this

Maybe I will stop wanting what other people have once I see that I have what other people want.

Reposted from Acataphasja

juneocallagh, beingme and janem803 like this

The man who invented autocorrect has died.

Restaurant in Peace

Reposted from anonymous

emiledi77 and UserOne like this

Maybe we dont
exist at all...we are
just a bunch of
passing thoughts.

Reposted from anonymous

janem803 likes this

Once you've read the dictionary, every other book you read is just a remix

Reposted from ErikSmit

Sherry89 and ErikSmit like this

When you get angry, take a deep breath and count to ten.

When you get to eight, throw a punch.

No one ever expects that.

Reposted from rho13

janem803 likes this

I was called lazy yesterday.

I almost responded.

Reposted from asadansari154

Fionacatherine likes this

Years of fears,
Years of tears,
Years of strife
All your life.
Can you change?
Would be strange.
Once begun,
Could be done.
Would be great,
So don't wait,
Don't hesitate,
Or it's too late.

Reposted from UserOne

purplechill, UserOne and janem803 like this

The more I find myself
The more people I lose

Reposted from Fionacatherine

visorvice likes this

If cats could text you back, they wouldn't.

Reposted from BJcore

Bettydent likes this

be honest when in trouble
be simple when in welth
be polite when in authority
be silent when in anger

Reposted from Quotrrr

A pessimist just stands in the rain.

An optimist showers under clouds.

Reposted from Sunshine123

Sunshine123 likes this

A
drop
o f rain
fell on the
glass a n d I
thought about
us. Two rain drops
join together on the
glass they become one
and the slide looks like a
meteor between the single
rain drops that look like stars.
And than other rain drops keep
joining and falling in different
directions giving the image
of a clear sky in the night
and me waiting the
shooting star.

Reposted from emiledi77

emiledi77 likes this

- rain puts a hole in the stone because of its constancy, not its force

just keep knocking on doors until the right one opens -

Reposted from supermanisdead

and there were always those nights where she preferred the rain over people. because the rain would remind her of how she should feel and people would remind her of the things she always wanted to forget.

Reposted from EmilyTudor

I'm confident my last words will be,

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Reposted from Fionacatherine

Do you ever look at someone and just think:

Dickhead

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

What do you call a woman with no ass hole?

Single!!!

Reposted from NerdWord

I just want to read, have a snack, and then take a nap. Why can't adult Kindergarten be a thing?

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

"I would not trade the laughter of my heart for the fortunes of the multitudes"

-Kahlil Gibran

"But I might frown for a little while if it meant I could not have to worry about paying the bills"

-Me

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

Interviewer:
So, tell me about yourself

Me:
I'd rather not...
I really need this job.

Reposted from chrysti

Try to be less of a fucking piece of shit than you were yesterday.

- Buddha

Reposted from satan

UserOne likes this

It's cute
how everyone gets offended by everything and everyone.

Reposted from sarcaSM

YOU KNOW THAT TINGLY FEELING YOU GET WHEN YOU ARE FALLING FOR SOMEONE?

THAT'S THE COMMON SENSE LEAVING YOUR BODY!

Reposted from juneocallagh

UserOne and juneocallagh like this

People are odd.
And no, I didn't just
notice that, but the
timing felt right to
say it out loud.

Reposted from JodieT

JodieT likes this

Don't live the same year 75 times and call it a life.

Reposted from Sunshine123

Sunshine123 likes this

NOTE TO SELF
you are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm

Reposted from superfoxyana

I took the road less travelled and now i don't know where the fuck i am.

Reposted from Bettydent

purplechill likes this

WHAT IF YOUR DOG ONE DAY JUST RANDOMLY SAID,

"NOBODY IS GOING TO BELIEVE YOU"

AND NEVER SPOKE AGAIN? •.•

Reposted from juneocallagh

juneocallagh likes this

There should be a Shazam for bird noises to identify the bird

Reposted from ErikSmit

juneocallagh likes this

If Google started a dating site based on everything they know about their users, the results would be insane

Reposted from ErikSmit

juneocallagh and ErikSmit like this

looked on the bright side and was like "ew"

Reposted from sosadtoday

juneocallagh likes this

I want a simple life. I want to get up late, drink coffee and read old books. I also want a spaceship and a pet dragon

Reposted from ErikSmit

ErikSmit likes this

Google told me to do it

Reposted from Ziya

As a little girl I always started crying when someone pulled my hair.

How things change.

Reposted from anonymous

janem803 likes this

We are the last generation that has played on the street, the first to play video games and are the last to record songs from the radio on tape.

Reposted from CleoBe

Panic attacks left me a vital message: I do not want to die and have lived in vain. And suddenly there was this voice inside me saying: Enjoy this life. Follow joy. Be grateful and enjoy your life, one little joyful treat at the time.

Reposted from juliettebravo

purplechill likes this

The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant.

The population is growing.

Reposted from perellano

juneocallagh likes this

Show up.

Even when you don't feel like showing up.

Reposted from UserOne

janem803 and UserOne like this

The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts while the stupid ones are full of confidence

Reposted from anonymous

Stuff your bra with confetti so when he takes it off you can be like "Surprise, I'm flat!" But he knows it's still a party cause confetti....

Reposted from sudeshnarocks

sudeshnarocks and bold like this

Semen ejaculates
at 27 mph, making it illegal in school zones.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

Pollen is essentially "plant sperm".

Therefore, this makes hay fever an STD.

Since no one voluntarily takes in pollen, it's obvious that we're all being raped by trees.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne and Sasquatchprime like this

Can't talk, telepathy only !!

Reposted from sudeshnarocks

purplechill and sudeshnarocks like this

I miss my pre-internet brain...

Reposted from cedbuzz

purplechill likes this

Sun goes down earlier for short people.

Reposted from hebdifescht

i just burnt my tongue on some food

they say the ones you love hurt you the most

Reposted from _chxrlie

purplechill likes this

My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"

Reposted from Nanoolsen

I'm like a kid in a candy store. I can't fuckin afford anything!

Reposted from misterlab

NerdWord likes this

well at least I can eat peanuts without dying

Reposted from sarcaSM

bold likes this

Excuse me, but I don't like the tone of what you're not sayin'.

Reposted from MyM

NerdWord likes this

Yet, despite the look on my face, you're still talking.

Reposted from anonymous

NerdWord likes this

I can turn all kinds of food into shit

Reposted from ErikSmit

ErikSmit likes this

Roses are red.
Wine is red too.
Poems are hard.
Wine.

Reposted from naebitnae

purplechill and idiomatic like this

treat every problem like your dog would, if you can't eat or fuck it...
piss on it and walk away

Reposted from ErikSmit

purplechill, idiomatic and ErikSmit like this

BEING AN ADULT IS MOSTLY BEING EXHAUSTED,
WISHING YOU HADN'T MADE PLAN'S AND WONDERING HOW YOU HURT YOUR BACK?

Reposted from juneocallagh

purplechill and idiomatic like this

i have
sexdaily.

i mean
dyslexia.

fcuk!

Reposted from annairie

idiomatic and zeitreisender like this

I need one of those hugs that turns into sex.

Reposted from SourceBlack

SourceBlack and idiomatic like this

"What have I done?" is probably the question I ask myself most on a daily basis.

Reposted from anonymous

purplechill and idiomatic like this

$That moment when you are on the toilet and figure out that you forgot to take the phone. O nooooooooo | / | |_(__ \ \ ) \ ) ( /_ " " " " " " " "" " " " " "$

Reposted from emiledi77

purplechill and idiomatic like this

Just because you're
trash doesn't mean you
can't do great things.

It's called garbage can,
not garbage cannot!

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

purplechill, Ms_Ntlebi and idiomatic like this

lalochezia

(n.) the emotional relief gained from using abusive or profane language.

Reposted from darkstarrr

idiomatic likes this

My favorite mythical creature is the happy bitch in tampon commercials.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

purplechill and idiomatic like this

It's both frustrating and disturbing when I use two fingers trying to zoom in on a picture in a magazine

Reposted from sarcaSM

purplechill and idiomatic like this

You say I'm swearing, but I say I'm seasoning the sentence to enhance the flavor.

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

idiomatic likes this

i don't think there will be enough coffee or middle fingers for this shit!

Reposted from jaybyrd

purplechill, idiomatic, aana and jaybyrd like this

Some parents sing the clean up song, but I just yell, "I'm getting garbage bags you better hope you can pick up your toys faster than I can'"

Reposted from anonymous

jpgm, idiomatic and aana like this

To Whom It May Concern
FUCK OFF

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa, purplechill and idiomatic like this

A little bit of kinky fuckery doesn't hurt anyone.

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa, purplechill and idiomatic like this

A little bit of kinky fuckery doesn't hurt anyone.

Reposted from 2schaa

idiomatic likes this

I tried seeing from your point of view... but, two heads don't fit up your ass.

Reposted from 2schaa

aana likes this

Instead of teaching kids that everybody is equal, we should teach them that everybody is different and that thats OK!

Reposted from ErikSmit

ErikSmit and aana like this

I just made out a long to-do list for tomorrow. I just can't figure out who's going to do it.

Reposted from misterlab

purplechill, misterlab and aana like this

Actual complaint to a travel agent:

"I was bitten by a mosquito.

The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

Actual complaint to a travel agent:

"I was bitten by a mosquito.

The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

Actual complaint to a travel agent:

"My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

SILLY ME!
I NEVER REALIZED IT'S ONE RULE FOR YOU AND A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT ONE FOR ME.

Reposted from juneocallagh

Some people couldn't be nice even if a Unicorn shoved a Fairy Wand up their ass while Judy Garland stood there singing Over the Rainbow.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

Hands up if your mama didn't raise a fool.

A freakin' psycho maybe, but not a fool.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

Finding friends with the same mental disorder,

Priceless!

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

I can't stop drinking about
you.

Reposted from harlequina

emiledi77 likes this

Gentle Reminder : Please check if you are on WiFi or mobile data.

emiledi77 likes this

Without a good Sidekick my zest for life is just a swath of Blah.

Reposted from Authlander

jupiter, redikryeziu, purplechill, emiledi77 and Authlander like this

Without purpose
readily defined by a carefully crafted label of judgemental perspective, you're just a dick.

Reposted from Authlander

redikryeziu, purplechill, emiledi77 and Authlander like this

You cannot even begin to fathom, the extent of fuck I do not give today...

Reposted from 2schaa

EasierSaid246, redikryeziu, purplechill, 2schaa and emiledi77 like this

When I Look Around Me At People, I Realize I'm Not As Fucked Up As I Thought I Was. . . .

Reposted from NerdWord

emiledi77 and NerdWord like this

just grew up and it was horrible

Reposted from sosadtoday

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

If you're feeling down. . .
I can feel you up !

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

Never
pass
up
an
opportunity
to
pee.

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

Remember me ?

You kicked me while i was down.

I got back up, and now you're fucked.

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

Well well well

If it isn't the sperm that survived.

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

Arguments needn't be a verbal tug of war. We simply need to learn to disagree better.

Reposted from anonymous

emiledi77 likes this

I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet . . .

I asked my 17 brothers and sisters, and they didn't know either

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

Don't ask me what I'm doing,
you know im out here being cute

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

NO GUTS
NO GLORY
NO LEGEND
NO STORY

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

As the shit deepens . . .

I just smile and buy higher heels

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

People say,

"go big or go home"

as if going home were a bad thing.

Hell yeah i wanna go home.

And I'm gonna take a nap when i get there.

Reposted from Bettydent

emiledi77 likes this

"There are things within us all that can never be unleashed."

Reposted from SourceBlack

SourceBlack and emiledi77 like this

SOMETIMES YOU MEET SOMEONE YOU JUST CLICK,
I DON'T BELIEVE IN LOVE LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT,
BUT I SURE BELIEVE IN THAT CLICK.

Reposted from juneocallagh

emiledi77 likes this

Live Your Life Like No One Is Watching

Reposted from anonymous

emiledi77 likes this

We want emotion instead of information.

Reposted from dAn

emiledi77 likes this

When I'm flirting with you...
Please cooperate.

Reposted from 2schaa

emiledi77 likes this

Knowledge is a poor buffer against reality

Reposted from Ziya

emiledi77 likes this

Courage, dear heart.

Reposted from Junglipunjaban

purplechill, juneocallagh, UserOne and emiledi77 like this

THE TRAGEDY
OF LIFE IS NOT
DEATH,
BUT WHAT WE
LET DIE INSIDE
OF US
WHILE WE LIVE.

Reposted from juneocallagh

juneocallagh, UserOne and emiledi77 like this

you act like it's you against the world. but it's really just you against yourself.

Reposted from jaybyrd

janem803, purplechill, juneocallagh, UserOne, emiledi77 and jaybyrd like this

You may see me struggle
but you will not see me fall.

Reposted from phuamaxx

janem803, purplechill, juneocallagh, phuamaxx, UserOne and emiledi77 like this

Trust me...
When I woke up today, I had no plans to be this sexy.
But hey, shit happens.

Reposted from Dwell

juneocallagh, UserOne and emiledi77 like this

Don't think if I understand-I care

Don't think if we're talking-we're friends

Reposted from Fionacatherine

juneocallagh, purplechill and emiledi77 like this

couple of days from now i will be in paradise but for now i'm just here stuck in the morning train and wondering why the hell am i not born a millionaire •••

Reposted from purplechill

juneocallagh, purplechill and emiledi77 like this

Me: Only God can judge me.

God: He's a dickhead.

Reposted from satan

juneocallagh and emiledi77 like this

As a struggling intellectual,
I'm not above biting you to win the argument...

Reposted from satan

juneocallagh, purplechill and emiledi77 like this

an extra chin keeps you company when you're alone

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

I'm the 'people who fart in the elevator and leave with a smile' type of guy.

Reposted from satan

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

Small kids, drunks and yoga pants always tell the truth.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

You know the sex is good when it sounds like running in flip flops.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

"The bible was written by boys with daddy issues."

- S. Freud

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

You're only as old as you feel, they say. So, 80. Today it's 80.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 and zeitreisender like this

Your secrets are safe with me, because I usually don't listen to what you say.

Reposted from satan

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

Parenting 2.0:

Don't let your son get crucified.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

Parenting 2.0:

Don't let your son get crucified.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

We're just shower friends.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

BORN TO
PARTY

FORCED
TO WORK

Reposted from satan

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

Living faster than the speed of regret.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

I only date women who look like they could help me hide a body.

Reposted from satan

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

One of the highest goals in life is to have a Psychiatric disorder named after you.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

One of the highest goals in life is to have a Psychiatric disorder named after you.

Reposted from satan

emiledi77 likes this

Headphones are my favorite anti-bullshit device.

Reposted from satan

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

Oh what a lovely day. Everything's still stupid and we're
all dying.

Reposted from satan

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

THE MOST DANGEROUS ANIMAL IN THE WORLD?

IS A SMILING WOMAN SITTING IN SILENCE.

Reposted from juneocallagh

purplechill and emiledi77 like this

INHALE
THE
GOOD
SHIT...
EXHALE
THE
BULLSHIT.

Reposted from juneocallagh

purplechill, juneocallagh and emiledi77 like this

Come on phone, let's
get out of here.

Reposted from Lieutenant

purplechill, juneocallagh and emiledi77 like this

If i hear you chew your food i'm fantasizing about how to kill you..

Reposted from aana

aana, juneocallagh, emiledi77 and UserOne like this

I NEED A NAP... AND BY NAP
I MEAN A SMALL COMA SO I CAN HIDE FROM MY LIFE.

Reposted from delight_ecards

juneocallagh, emiledi77 and UserOne like this

precautions precautions everywhere why do you do, when no one cares?

janem803, locupleto, EmpressTygress, Vandtastic, PenSword72, SourceBlack, Parole, alwaysrite, juneocallagh and emiledi77 like this

reposted by juneocallagh and emiledi77

Nowhere
to
go
but
everything
to
see..

Reposted from aana

PenSword72, aana and emiledi77 like this

Don't get burned twice by the same flame.

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

But fortune comes later....
Not just good but greater..

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

“YOU ARE STRONG, RIGHT?”

“YES. MOSTLY. ”

“AND WHAT ABOUT THE SOMETIMES?”

“WELL, SOMETIMES A COOL BREEZE PASSES BY AND BREAKS ME IN A THOUSAND PIECES..”

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

Go for it. Whether it ends good or bad it was an experience.

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

Go for it. Whether it ends good or bad it was an experience.

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

"and if they want to leave, hold the door open for them."

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

“Butterflies cannot see their wings. But the rest of the world can.”

-You. You are beautiful and while you may not see it, we can.

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

DAMN,

THAT SMILE

Reposted from aana

aana and emiledi77 like this

I decided to write in the rain to see if the water would take the ink somewhere I would like to follow.

Reposted from anonymous

purplechill, emiledi77 and MAMONI like this

don't lower your expectations
just slower your expectations

Reposted from anonymous

emiledi77 likes this

"Fuck it" tends to be the last thought I have before making a decision.

Reposted from lbmilton

emiledi77, purplechill, Fionacatherine and juneocallagh like this

It's okay to be scared,
but you have to get out there, open up, love, make mistakes, learn, be stronger,

and start all over again.

@UserOne / boldomatic.com

Reposted from UserOne

janem803, UserOne, emiledi77, purplechill, Fionacatherine and juneocallagh like this

Never forget 3 types of people in your life:

• who helped you in your difficult times

• who left you in your difficult times

• who put you in difficult times

Reposted from uglyteen

emiledi77, purplechill and juneocallagh like this

Never be afraid to speak your own truth.

Reposted from anonymous

emiledi77 likes this

When you try your hardest not to be a fucker, but everyone you deal with is a fucker, so you end up being a bigger fucker just to outfuck the fuckers.

Reposted from naebitnae

emiledi77 and naebitnae like this

What to do? My dog reads my mind and my parrot talks behind my back...

Reposted from Fionacatherine

Courage is contagious.

When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are stiffened.

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne and purplechill like this

If I failed to succeed, did I succeed at failing?

And does that mean that whether I succeed or fail, I still succeed (and fail?) 100% of the time?

Reposted from UserOne

UserOne likes this

The fact is that children learn to make decisions by making decisions, not by following directions.

(Alfie Kohn)

Reposted from KnightofSIAL

hensch, purplechill and aana like this

Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact.

Everything we see is perspective, not the truth.

~ Marcus Aurelis

Reposted from UserOne

hensch, aana, UserOne and juneocallagh like this

Don't practice until you get it right,

practice until you can't get it wrong.

Reposted from UserOne

aana and UserOne like this

Did you know?

Hot water is heavier than cold water.

Reposted from UserOne

hensch, UserOne and aana like this

Don't be
easy to
define.

Let them wonder
about you.

Reposted from aana

aana likes this

Becoming a vegetarian is a big missed steak.

Reposted from newbe

you don't get the ass you want by sitting on it!

Reposted from dreamworld

dreamworld likes this

There should be a
Calorie refund for things that didn't taste as good as you expected...!

Reposted from anonymous

SUDESNA15 likes this

LOOK LEFT---------->you failed

Reposted from 2ndDragoon

life is like a pubic hair on a toilet seat, you hang on and you hang on but eventually you get pissed off

Reposted from RedLaw

We are all ordinary.
We are all boring.
We are all spectacular. We are all shy.
We are all bold.
We are all heroes.
We are all helpless.
It just depends on the day.

Reposted from avant-garde

hensch and avant-garde like this

The reason why people give up
so fast is because they tend to look at how far they
still have to go, instead of how far they have come.

Reposted from UserOne

purplechill likes this

it's not art unless it has the potential to be a disaster

Reposted from avant-garde

avant-garde likes this

PEACE

It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work.

It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.

Reposted from UserOne

juneocallagh, UserOne and purplechill like this

ain't it funny that someday i'll be a couple of photos you forgot to delete

Reposted from ezzoo911

Either I will find a way or I will make one.....!!

Reposted from anonymous

sudeshna likes this

Some women are lost in fire.
Some are built from it....

Reposted from anonymous

sudeshna likes this

You don't get paid for having ideas.

You get paid for making them happen.

Reposted from avant-garde

avant-garde likes this

In a few years from now make sure you can say that you chose your life and not that you settled for it.

Reposted from avant-garde

avant-garde likes this

Mi papá tiene 47 años.
= My dad is 47 years old.

Mi papa tiene 47 anos.
= My potato has
47 assholes.

I love Spanish!

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

whoever thinks money doesn't bring you happiness, transfer it to my account.

Reposted from avant-garde

purplechill and avant-garde like this

there is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do -and not doing it. ..

Reposted from anonymous

sis likes this

where does all my money go?! It's like hocus pocus, I am brokus.

Reposted from avant-garde

avant-garde likes this

I'm transfinancial.

A rich man born in a poor man's body.

Reposted from BJcore

I'm going to stand outside.
So if anyone asks,
I am outstanding.

Reposted from dreamworld

I'm not necessarily saying I want to be rich but it would be nice to not have to check my bank account before purchasing Ramen noodles

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love....

Reposted from anonymous

purplechill and sudeshna like this

I Now Pronounce You Man and WiFi. And then they lived happily everafter....

Reposted from anonymous

sudeshna likes this

When I was kid I had all the answers, now I'm adult and I'm wondering where the heck I put them.....

Reposted from anonymous

sudeshna likes this

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next ???

Reposted from anonymous

sudeshna likes this

The world would be a better place if all these adults would shut the fuck up.

Reposted from erin.desmond

purplechill and erin.desmond like this

just don't ask me any questions in the morning. thanks.

Reposted from _Nathalie_

_Nathalie_ likes this

I want to get
a parrot
and train it to say:
I've been turned
into a parrot.

Reposted from stargater

The whole purpose of sending a text is to get a reply within seconds or minutes, otherwhise I would have sent a letter by fucking mail.

Reposted from avant-garde

Sometimes you have to self destruct in order to self discover, and understand that the only person you must learn to let go,

is you.

Reposted from MissB

The biggest communication problem is we don't listen to understand.

We listen to reply.

Reposted from Lichtwaechter

it's 2016 and we still can't unsend text messages

Reposted from avant-garde

Love is saying
"I know you're a fucking psycho manic but I'm willing to work
with that."

Reposted from flipflap

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.
~Dale Carnegie

Reposted from seeker

jcbatesy likes this

Even if your not successful in life, you are guaranteed to get two certificates.

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa likes this

Trick or treat, smell my feet,
give me something good to eat.

Reposted from meohmy

meohmy likes this

It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves that will make them successful human beings.
~Ann Landers

Reposted from seeker

purplechill likes this

Dream the dream, but live the life.

Reposted from seeker

Life is too ironic to fully understand.
It takes sadness to know what happiness is. Noise to appreciate silence and absence to value presence.

Reposted from Stephina.

You can sway a thousand men by appealing to their prejudices quicker than you can convince one man by logic.
~Robert A. Heinlein

Reposted from seeker

purplechill likes this

Today's forecast - Sunrise, sunset & some shit in between.

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa and purplechill like this

We are drowning in information, while starving for wisdom. ~E.O. Wilson

Reposted from seeker

UserOne, anna.panayi11, mng and juneocallagh like this

be the kind of gentleman that holds the door
open for your girl, but smacks her ass as she walks in.

Reposted from annairie

annairie likes this

You aren't going to get the butt you want sitting on the one you have.

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa likes this

How to stop time: kiss.
How to travel in time: read.
How to escape time: music.
How to feel time: write.
How to release time: breathe.
~ Matt Haig, Reasons to Stay Alive

Reposted from seeker

No such thing as spare time.
No such thing as free time.
No such thing as down time.
All you got is life time.
Go.
~Henry Rollins

Reposted from seeker

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. ~Thomas Alva Edison

Reposted from seeker

#wonderofthesea, #wwf

this is where I draw the line

_

Reposted from sarcaSM

juneocallagh likes this

tomorrow, i have to go to the doctor for a "procedure".

translation....

some asshole is going to ram something big into someplace small

FML

Reposted from blot

juneocallagh likes this

tomorrow, i have to go to the doctor for a "procedure".

translation....

some asshole is going to ram something big into someplace small

FML

Reposted from blot

There's something about the last train that soothes me. Looking at these people in suits with weary faces from work and/or drinking is a reminder that I am not trying my best here alone.

Reposted from soyy

Those whose minds posses a broken piece are expected to function with broken circuits. And when they malfunction, they attack the computer instead of the issue.

Reposted from OneWingedAngel

Instead of "have a nice day", I think I'll start saying "Have the day you desserve". You know, let karma sort that shit out

Reposted from Babs_77

Babs_77 and juneocallagh like this

$\••/ I THINK BEES TEACH US AN IMPORTANT LESSON, YOU MAY BE SMALL,YOU MAY BE TINY, BUT WHEN YOU'RE CHASING SOMEBODY WITH A SHARP OBJECT...... PEOPLE STILL RUN AWAY FROM YOU..$

Reposted from juneocallagh

juneocallagh likes this

Don't make me use my caps lock.

Reposted from 2schaa

UserOne, juneocallagh, haddock and 2schaa like this

some friendships, you never see coming.

Reposted from jaybyrd

UserOne, anna.panayi11, juneocallagh and jaybyrd like this

If my presence brought no joy,
may my absence bring relief.

Reposted from anonymous

juneocallagh likes this

I could
write poems on your neck with my lips.

Reposted from De_liefste

anna.panayi11, juneocallagh and De_liefste like this

sometimes all you need is 1 million dollar and a new identity.

Reposted from eliane

haddock likes this

Here's an irony--to die in the living room.

Reposted from misterlab

misterlab likes this

I knew I would
find you at
the centre of
my storm

Reposted from anonymous

haddock likes this

Until the lion learns how to write, every story will glorify the hunter.

Reposted from anonymous

haddock likes this

If you ever feel powerless, remember that a single one of your pubic hairs can shut down a whole restaurant.

Reposted from BJcore

When you truly need a teacher - a teacher will find you.

Reposted from anonymous

haddock likes this

When you truly need a teacher - a teacher will find you.

Reposted from anonymous

locupleto, anna.panayi11, mng and haddock like this

See the world, not how
it is, but how it should be. Be kind, have courage, and never stop believing in the magic.

Reposted from JodieT

JodieT likes this

See the world, not how
it is, but how it should be. Be kind, have courage, and never stop believing in the magic.

Reposted from JodieT

Evolve, with me. Through shit storms and muddy ditches, as well as laughter and clear skies. And I will weather your metamorphoses, too. I swear, you won't regret it. I know, I won't, either.

Reposted from anonymous

PenSword72 likes this

Don't forget that there are people, that when you want to know the truth, all you have to do is ask

Reposted from anonymous

haddock likes this

Lonely is not being alone, its the feeling that no one cares....

Reposted from aana

aana likes this

I see you.
Amongst the noise, the human fog, the grinding whirl of
daily expectations and neverending
rush that is life.
I see you.

Reposted from anonymous

haddock likes this

in a room full of art, i'd still stare at you.

Reposted from jaybyrd

jaybyrd likes this

Sometimes you have to close your eyes, take a deep breath, count to ten, realize that you really don't look good in prison stripes, open your eyes, smile at the motherfucker, and just walk away.

Reposted from rhodesia

The real power of a man is the size of the smile of the woman sitting next to him

Reposted from ErikSmit

ErikSmit likes this

The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said. ~Peter F. Drucker

Reposted from seeker

Did you know, that 3-4 glasses of wine per day can reduce your risk of giving a shit.

Reposted from anonymous

It hurts when you have someone in your heart but you can't have them in your arms.

Reposted from _Nathalie_

Nothing lasts,
but it remains.
Nothing finishes,
but it starts.
Nothing is perfect,
but it's yours.

Reposted from JodieT

JodieT likes this

you cannot make everybody happy.
you're not a Nutella jar.

Reposted from De_liefste

If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. The world needs more of that.

Reposted from Pesca

Pesca likes this

There are three simple realities: nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect.

Reposted from anonymous

mng likes this

I'm not snoring.
I'm dreaming I'm a motorcycle.
~unknown

Reposted from seeker

Beauty on the inside doesn't get you free drinks.

Reposted from anonymous

Go away responsibilities, nobody likes you.

Reposted from satan

Beauty on the inside doesn't get you free drinks.

Reposted from anonymous

#escapetheaquarium

greet the world and everything in it with a new, beautiful breath of
fuck that

Reposted from bold

It's okay if you don't like me, not everyone has good taste.

Reposted from avant-garde

avant-garde likes this

I don't need a significant other

just a significant income

Reposted from avant-garde

UserOne and avant-garde like this

my brain has too many tabs open.

Reposted from jaybyrd

jaybyrd likes this

Give man a purpose and then see him create a legend.

Never ask a woman her age. Or her weight. Or anything. Just stare, breathe and hope for the best.

Reposted from GaylrdSprFckr

You are only one decision away from a totally different life.
~Mark Batterson

Reposted from seeker

In today's case, all I really want to say here is. Fuck it.

Reposted from anonymous

a best friend is someone who loves you when you have forgotten how to love yourself

Reposted from anonymous

Qball likes this

Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters -

cannot be trusted with important matters

Reposted from anjellica

anjellica likes this

Why do some couples make their status "single" every time they fight? I don't put "orphan" when I get into fights with my parents.

Reposted from Duncanville

Boldmatic; Where my mobile data comes to R.I.P

Reposted from EL_MerchanT

It's not what you are that holds you back, it's what you think you're not.
~unknown

Reposted from seeker

HER face,
i LOVE that shit!

Reposted from Smylz

i am not saying i am superman, i am just saying no one has ever seen me and superman in the same room.

Reposted from swisscub

Poor ppl are not poor for a lack of opportunity; most dont know where to begin looking, the other amount don't care to look.

We all have the same 24 hours.

Reposted from anonymous

When I installed boldomatic

#turningpoint

UserOne, foenix, MyM, ErikSmit and visorvice like this

I think relationshit is in the dicKtionary

Reposted from SomeGuy

How to have a flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Reposted from anonymous

I don't want good morning texts

I want good morning transfers to my bank account

Reposted from avant-garde

avant-garde likes this

I found my old Nokia phone from 1999.
It still has 83% battery life left.

Reposted from sarcaSM

I will never be a morning person.

The moon and i are too much in love.

Reposted from pasquale85

pasquale85 likes this

walk with me on the shady side of life

Reposted from pixtor

Childhood is a lot like being drunk. Everyone remembers what you did, except you.

Reposted from IO_N_O

If you are always trying to be normal you will never know what you actually are capable of...

Reposted from anonymous

...when you ate so much, that you can hardly breathe.

#awkward

dear customer service,

first of all i'm typing this with my middle finger........

Reposted from jaybyrd

jaybyrd likes this

Sometimes,
the right words
just show up at
the right time.

Reposted from JodieT

Better grab my dumbrella.

It's really stupid out there today.

Reposted from blackboxmagic

Never depend on someone else to make you happy, that's what alcohol is for.

Reposted from bold

bold likes this

Work until your idols become your rivals.

Reposted from 27thAvenue

don't give up on your dreams.

keep sleeping.

Reposted from Sonndich

Life is like a Bollywood movie: colorful, humorous, and usually you have no idea what the fuck is going on.

Reposted from erin.desmond

100% of non-
smokers die too.

Reposted from beesmoove

BEFORE SEX...YOU HELP EACH OTHER GET NAKED, AFTER SEX YOU ONLY DRESS YOURSELF.

MORAL OF THE STORY: IN LIFE NO ONE HELPS YOU

ONCE YOU'RE FUCKED.

Reposted from bold

Today a feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships.....apparently "in HD" was not the right answer...

Reposted from pasquale85

pasquale85 likes this

If women ruled this world, there would be no wars.

Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other.

Reposted from satan

Sometimes I feel useless but then
I remember
I breathe out carbon dioxide for plants.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

At the end of the day, life should ask us,
Do you want to save the changes?

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa likes this

My love is like a candle.

If you forget me, I'll burn your house down.

Reposted from manutd7770

I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY
AND MAYBE
A LITTLE BIT NAKED.

Reposted from cococaro

A lot of people cry when they cut onions, the trick is not to form an emotional bond.

Reposted from JodieT

The trouble with jogging is, by the time you realize you're not fit for it, it's too far to walk back •

Reposted from Lirpae..

Lirpae.. likes this

The trouble with jogging is, by the time you realize you're not fit for it, it's too far to walk back •

Reposted from Lirpae..

Lirpae.. likes this

I'm multitasking,

I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time

Reposted from aehmpaeh

aehmpaeh likes this

I don't make mistakes,
I date them.

Reposted from frauheinrich

Quiet people have the loudest minds.

Reposted from bold

Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.

Reposted from bold

A baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear.

Unless it's 3am.

And you're home alone.

And you don't have a baby.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

LET'S DO SOME "WE SHOULDN'T BE DOING THIS" THINGS.

Reposted from mjf

Home sweet mess.

Reposted from loryane

Today, 2 year olds can unlock an iPhone, open and close their favorite apps all by themselves.

When I was that age,
I was eating dirt.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

Try to be less of a fucking piece of shit than you were yesterday.

- Buddha

Reposted from satan

If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.

Reposted from Pesca

Pesca likes this

Sun goes down earlier for short people.

Reposted from hebdifescht

others have sex in the kitchen, I eat in bed

Reposted from anonymous

Voices in your head - normal

Listening to them - common

Arguing with them - acceptable

Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM

Reposted from inesmbandeira

Voices in your head - normal

Listening to them - common

Arguing with them - acceptable

Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM

Reposted from inesmbandeira

i just burnt my tongue on some food

they say the ones you love hurt you the most

Reposted from _chxrlie

I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.

Reposted from brenlouwin

If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.

Reposted from 27thAvenue

My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"

Reposted from Nanoolsen

My internet was down for 5 minutes so I went downstairs and spoke to my family.

They seem like nice people.

Reposted from anonymous

I HOPE YOUR DAY IS AS NICE AS YOUR BUTT

Reposted from pinche_raffie

laundry today
or
naked tomorrow

Reposted from sarilarifari

The closest I get to camping is staying at a hotel with no wifi.

Reposted from anonymous

Job applications are so stupid.

"Why do you want to work for us?"

"Oh, I've always had a passion to frozen yogurt MOTHERFUCKER I'M BROKE."

Reposted from anonymous

a yawn is silent scream for coffee

Reposted from anonymous

Qball likes this

You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning.

Reposted from chipdicks