WirelessJoo's Posts

We are the last generation that has played on the street, the first to play video games and are the last to record songs from the radio on tape.

Reposted from CleoBe

FrankFilocamo and juneocallagh like this

Tonight... THE DOCTOR RETURNS!

Moon-D, WirelessJoo, Jacob_Dallas, JodieT and timtomdan like this

$80% of the people are not good at math. I guess I belong to the other 25%$

Reposted from avant-garde

A.M. and Jacob_Dallas like this

Remember when a hashtag was a pound?

Reposted from anonymous

dor1316, 2schaa and RamonaStewart like this

My phone auto corrects "haha" into "gags"
or "hag"
Apologies, if that happens,

You are very attractive, and you don't make me want to puke..

Reposted from JodieT

janem803, kj55, Jacob_Dallas and Gabbem like this

Can we start the weekend over again?

I wasn't ready...

Reposted from anonymous

campino, 2schaa, kj55 and oda00m like this

There are not enough love songs about the moment you see your luggage appear at baggage claim.

Reposted from satan

arosen, coco03 and satan like this

I wake up everyday intending to be productive and then a voice in my head says "Haha good one!" and we laugh and laugh and take a nap.

Reposted from GaylrdSprFckr

janem803, campino and dor1316 like this

There's no better feeling than going to bed at night and not have to set an alarm for tomorrow morning

Reposted from chrille11

janem803, UserOne, campino, dor1316, donnadjbrwngm, coco03, GaylrdSprFckr and arosen like this

That moment when you feel the urge to just slap someone with a piece of bacon...

is it just me?

Reposted from anonymous

arosen and Gabbem like this

I have no problem browsing my phone while driving, but I won't text while going down stairs. That shit's dangerous.

Reposted from 2schaa

janem803 and donnadjbrwngm like this

A baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear.

Unless it's 3am.

And you're home alone.

And you don't have a baby.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

janem803 and arosen like this

I'm done chasing after people who aren't willing to do the same for me. After today, the ice cream man can go fuck himself.

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

arosen and dor1316 like this

Step aside coffee, this is a job for alcohol.

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

UserOne, supermom, pztk, dor1316, 2schaa and Ms_Ntlebi like this

Children can be split into two groups:

Those that think *you* know everything

and

Those that think *they* know everything.

Reposted from JodieT

janem803 likes this

Thinking twice about commenting on a post, because of the never-ending stream of notifications..

Ah, screw it.

Reposted from JodieT

janem803 and kolarg like this

At night,
I can't sleep.

In the morning,
I can 't wake up

Reposted from TriniDady

arosen likes this

One day I will rule the world, until then I'm going to bed.

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

janem803, supermom, pztk, kolarg, Ms_Ntlebi, dor1316, coco03 and Gabbem like this

Does running away from problems count as exercise?

Reposted from snajsig

darkstarrr likes this

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.
-Mr Spock

Reposted from kateelgar

janem803 likes this

The 5 second rule for food dropped on the floor doesn't work if you have a 2 second dog.

Reposted from freeyomind

janem803, arosen, dor1316 and kj55 like this

When I get to heaven I'm going to ask God three things; when were dinosaurs here, if you UFO's exist and what happens to my socks...

Reposted from flickster

Deborah.A and dor1316 like this

Your job history is only slightly less embarrassing than your browser history.

Reposted from NukeSkywalker

Deborah.A and arosen like this

10% of conflicts are due to differences in opinion.

90% are due to wrong tone of voice.

Reposted from swatchUSA

janem803, swatchUSA and Deborah.A like this

Everyone's crazy except you and me.

And I'm not that sure about you.

Reposted from anonymous

janem803, aoibh, Deborah.A, kj55 and arosen like this

I think your iPad is going to be a great mom

Reposted from NukeSkywalker

NukeSkywalker likes this

Anybody have any plans to stare at their phones somewhere exciting this weekend?

Reposted from cubjurholt

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Reposted from kj55

UserOne, pztk, coco03, Deborah.A, dor1316, donnadjbrwngm, kj55 and Gabbem like this

Don't like sex? Don't have it.
Don't like drugs? Don't use them.
Don't like abortions? Don't have one.
Don't like cigarettes? Don't smoke one.
Don't like gay marriage? Don't get one.
Don't like porn? Don't watch it.
Don't like alcohol? Don't drink it.
Don't like guns? Don't buy one.

Don't like your rights taken away?
Then don't take someone else's.

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

mylisa1970, dor1316, kj55 and Ms_Ntlebi like this

If you need a hand, you can find one at the end of your arm.

Reposted from Vollmongo

janem803, kolarg and 2schaa like this

If smartphones could talk, they'd be like:

"Seriously, you just checked that like 5 seconds ago"

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

darkstarrr and Ms_Ntlebi like this

"I support our troops, but not our President."

That's like saying you support the storm troopers, but not Darth Vader.

Reposted from anonymous

RamonaStewart and timtomdan like this

Any man can be a father. It takes someone special to be a dad.

Reposted from dor1316

dor1316 likes this

I am one Candy Crush invite away from murdering someone.

Reposted from Blitzkrieg

My new phone is gold. I feel like a pimp.
Now bring me a white fur coat and a top hat!

Reposted from JodieT

kj55 likes this

Whoever started the "cleaner than a baby's bottom" thing has never changed a diaper.

Reposted from kj55

kj55 likes this

It Just Doesn't Matter...It Just Doesn't Matter...

-Bill Murray(Meatballs)

If you're reading this that means you have nothing better to do. WOW... you're still reading this you must be bored. Holay crap, now you're just a stalker!

Reposted from IO_N_O

Deborah.A and rudeamplitude like this

My bed and i have a special relationship; we're perfect for each other. But my alarm clock just hates seeing us together.

Reposted from anonymous

Gabbem and kj55 like this

The two most important days in your life are-the day you were born and the day you realize why.

°Mark Twain

Reposted from dor1316

I have been putting a lot of thought into it and I just don't think being an adult is gonna work for me.

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

kolarg and Ms_Ntlebi like this

Every one Brightens A room some by entering some by leaving.

Reposted from IO_N_O

kolarg likes this

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

- Mark Twain

Reposted from Flockae

If you can't
text
and
walk...

please don't.

Reposted from rudeamplitude

NSA customer
service pledge:

You speak / We listen

Reposted from kj55

kj55 likes this

Reposted from anonymous

Serious advantage of being part of Generation X:
Your friends didn't have smartphones to record your stupid ass.

Reposted from anonymous

COFFEE -

A magical substance that turns, "Leave me alone or die", into "Good Morning, Honey!"

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

Ms_Ntlebi likes this

She made me feel like Chrome. Then treated me like Internet Explorer.

Reposted from caderind

2schaa likes this

nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it's time to get up

Reposted from avant-garde

Ikea: Legos for adults.

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa likes this

If you have time for Facebook you have time to exercise!

Reposted from anonymous

kj55 likes this

..and alas, the time came, when the battery was dead and the words had run dry..

Reposted from JodieT

If you want to keep someone happy, lie with them, not to them.

Reposted from anonymous

Sometimes, all you need is
$ 500 Million dollars

Reposted from anonymous

JodieT likes this

If you want something done right, do it yourself.

Reposted from dor1316

dor1316 likes this

When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume its for them?

Reposted from NukeSkywalker

dor1316 and NukeSkywalker like this

I wish I could read some people's minds just so I could know how stupid they were.

Reposted from misterlab

You havent truly won an argument until the other person says..

..."whatever"

Reposted from anonymous

Gabbem likes this

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the escape key!

Reposted from misterlab

misterlab likes this

Today friendships begin with facebook and end with internet problems.

Reposted from anonymous

I just updated iTunes, so I'm good for like 35 minutes.

Reposted from bold

Can whoever left me a voicemail please send me a text telling me whether it's worth listening to?

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

2schaa likes this

FB (facebook)
+
I (instagram)
=
FBI (database)

Reposted from Babs_77

Babs_77 likes this

Someone told me I'm immature.

Guess whose not allowed in my tree house?

Reposted from 2schaa

Madscience and 2schaa like this

Beauty doesn't have a weight limit •

Reposted from Lirpae..

Lirpae.. likes this

If you think about it... ketchup is a tomato smoothie.

Reposted from anonymous

"Shit, I have to break up with her in person? Isn't there an easier way?"

-Alexander Graham Bell

Reposted from sarcaSM

Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.

Reposted from Loupi4614

RulesOfLife, bold and Loupi4614 like this

A party without a cake is just a meeting!

Reposted from swatchUSA

Talk To Me Goose!

a foolish man tells a woman to stop talking.

a wise man tells her that her mouth looks extremely beautiful when her lips are closed.

Reposted from rhinstrom

darkstarrr, Deborah.A, dor1316 and misterlab like this

video games ruined my life.

thank god i've got many left!

Reposted from anonymous

My Name is Indigo Montoya... You killed my father... Prepare to DIE.....

JodieT likes this

what if there was no google?

i don't know, google it...

Reposted from anonymous

After Tuesday, even the calender goes
W T F

Reposted from anonymous

Don't grow up...

It's a trap!

Reposted from anonymous

Go to college.
Pay taxes.
Get a job.
Pay taxes.
Get married.
Pay taxes.
Buy a house.
Pay taxes.
Have 2 kids.
Pay taxes.
Die.
Pay taxes.

Reposted from anonymous

I'm honestly convinced some women don't fart. They just store it up, and it comes out as drama.

Reposted from anonymous

We all have that one skinny friend who eats more than an elephant.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

Askhole: A person who always asks for your advice yet always does the opposite.

Reposted from freeyomind

kj55 likes this

if it tastes like chicken then your doing it wrong

Reposted from anonymous

kj55 likes this

If no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it, then how bad of a decision can it really be.

Reposted from anonymous

JodieT and topbuzz like this

I hate it when my phone decides to randomly jump out of my hand and attack the floor •

Reposted from Lirpae..

I love asking kids what they want to be when they grow up because I'm still looking for ideas.

Reposted from NukeSkywalker

freeyomind and NukeSkywalker like this

Always tempted to yell "Kevin!" mid-flight

Reposted from Blitzkrieg

#homealone

Blitzkrieg likes this

Our generation's sleeping schedule depends on the percentage of battery left in the phone.

Reposted from Ms_Ntlebi

Ms_Ntlebi and 2schaa like this

May The Schwartz Be With
You.....

Strange things are AFOOT at the Circle K

SORRY!

The lifestyle you ordered is currently out of stock.

Reposted from JodieT

rudeamplitude and JodieT like this

I could do with a day between Saturday and Sunday

Reposted from mrschudleigh

dor1316 likes this

Your cousins are usually your first friends as a child. No one will ever understand your crazy family like your cousins. Even if you haven't talked to them in a while, like or repost if you love your cousins!

Reposted from swatchUSA

dor1316 likes this

A man's home is his castle... until the Queen arrives.

Reposted from MooseOnDaLoose

You're not
in a serious relationship until he
leaves you in a
room alone with
his phone.

Reposted from 2schaa

pztk, shimmer_07, dor1316 and 2schaa like this

PLAYING TETRIS REMINDS ME OF BETTER TIMES.

Reposted from Akatrine

You're KILLING ME SMALLS!

when i'm bored I send a text to a random phone number saying "I hid
the body... now what?"

Reposted from betterthanyou

dor1316 likes this

My damn iPhone is broken.

I pressed the home button and I'm still at work...

Reposted from GaylrdSprFckr

GaylrdSprFckr and dor1316 like this

Everything happens for a reason!

Sometimes the reason is that you are stupid and you make bad decisions.

Reposted from bold

dor1316 and bold like this

I
solemnly
swear
that
I
am
up
to
no
good...

Reposted from HissAtSunlight

UserOne, michi26, lollip2, sarcaSM, abe, JodieT, dor1316 and 2schaa like this

*
LIFE HAS NO
REMOTE.
GET UP AND
CHANGE IT
YOURSELF.

Reposted from LoveFunApps

Whenever I delete an app on my phone,
the shaking icons make me feel like they're all panicked over who's getting axed •

Reposted from Lirpae..

Lirpae.. likes this

I romantically stand outside your window and hold up my iPhone to blast OUR song...

...a 30sec ad video
plays first.

Reposted from BJcore

life is what happens when you put your phone down.

Reposted from anonymous

until 0% battery do us part

Reposted from bjygeronimo

bjygeronimo likes this

Today, 2 year olds can unlock an iPhone, open and close their favorite apps all by themselves.

When I was that age,
I was eating dirt.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

Today, 2 year olds can unlock an iPhone, open and close their favorite apps all by themselves.

When I was that age,
I was eating dirt.

Reposted from MeMyselfAnd..I

The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.

Reposted from anonymous

life is what happens when you put your phone down.

Reposted from anonymous

My internet was down for 5 minutes so I went downstairs and spoke to my family.

They seem like nice people.

Reposted from anonymous