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Posts Liked by carey99

my "i hate you" face must look very similar to my "tell me more" face.
i'll have to work on that.

85

Once upon a time, I was sweet & innocent.

And then,
shit happened!

78

A baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear.

Unless it's 3am.

And you're home alone.

And you don't have a baby.

240

twinkle twinkle little whore, close your legs, they're not a door

146

I wish I had boobs so people would stop making eye contact with me.

458

hipsters don't say "LOL" they say "LSIMHBIWFEFMTALOL"

(Laughing silently in my head because it wasn't funny enough for me to actually laugh out loud)

63

Sex jokes are not funny. I mean cum on people.

152

I think
you're suffering from a
lack of vitamin me.

2

I think
you're suffering from a
lack of vitamin me.

63

I do it because I can,

I can because I want to,

I want to because you said I couldn't. .

49

I believe the greatest sin you can commit against yourself is settling for less and knowingly forgetting how it feels to be alive.

36

There's a new disease called ear gonorrhea, you get it from listening to too many assholes.

20

tHis is A VEry SErious teXt post WITH no hidden MEaning.

47

all kinds of physical pain are still better than a little wound in your heart or brain

24

A real girl isn't perfect and a perfect girl isn't real.

66

music is the only drug we can't overdose

72

don't be bitter
be better

37

All things are difficult before they are easy

34

Be careful whose toes you step on today because they might be connected to the foot that kicks your ass tomorrow

29

The one, who causes you to fear and reject your own ability to love, and be loved, is the only ex that does "damage." The rest are just experiences and lessons. Don't let that one win.

34

Never stress over what could've been. Cause if it should've been then it would've been.

50

My Ex?
Yeah, I'd still hit that. Only this time with a bat, or maybe a car.

2

n(ex)t

65

My Ex?
Yeah, I'd still hit that. Only this time with a bat, or maybe a car.

8

Im
In
A
You.

State

Of

Miind.

3

Fall in love or fall in hate. Get inspired or be depressed. Ace a test or flunk a class. Make babies or make art. Speak the truth or lie and cheat. Dance on tables or sit in the corner. Life is divine chaos. Embrace it. Forgive yourself. Breathe. And enjoy the ride..

49

ONLY 3 TYPES OF PEOPLE WHO TELL THE TRUTH.

KIDS, DRUNK PEOPLE & ANYONE WHO IS PISSED THE FUCK OFF.

55

Fashion is what you buy. Style is what you do with it.

66

Faster than the speed of light is when you can take a bottle of beer out of the fridge before the light comes on.

263

True friendship isn't about being inseperable, it's being seperated and nothing changes.

40

If I'm still able to walk to the kitchen after sex, you don't deserve a sandwich.

128

I'm not a princess, I don't need saving!

I'm a queen, I got this shit handled!

2

I want you to know that I love the third word in this sentence.

179

beautiful things don't ask for attention

1

You never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.

2

I just eye rolled so hard, I burnt 5 calories.

105

You're not
in a serious relationship until he
leaves you in a
room alone with
his phone.

3

well, if you met my family you would understand

1

bacon is the new black

6

well, if you met my family you would understand

23

You never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.

23

You're not
in a serious relationship until he
leaves you in a
room alone with
his phone.

47

Real men
make your
panties wet,
not your eyes •

70

Sex Etiquette: Laughing is encouraged. Pointing and laughing is discouraged.

20

treat me like a princess
fuck me like a pornstar

69

You remind me of my big toe, cause i'm going to bang you on every piece of furniture I own

470

I'm not a princess, I don't need saving!

I'm a queen, I got this shit handled!

64

fuckity fuck fuck fuck

4

Twinkle, Twinkle little whore, close your legs it's not a door

8

Sex sucks.
- said no one ever.

3

push me up against a wall and do what you want

1

Don't compare your Chapter 1 to someone else's Chapter 20.

96

My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"

812

Ego is a race.
And in this race, the winner is the loser.

453

Throwing fertilizer at people that need to grow up.

105

some of the best moments in life are the ones you can't tell anyone about

160

I live for the nights that I can't remember with the people I won't forget.

478

Hey there Friday,
I've been waiting to see your sexy ass since Monday...let's do this.

100

THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.

416

*
LIFE HAS NO
REMOTE.
GET UP AND
CHANGE IT
YOURSELF.

128

BY THE WAY,
I'M WEARING
THE SMILE
YOU GAVE ME.

220

I said, "I love you" as I sat by him sipping my wine.
That's when he asked me, "is that you or the wine talking?"
I replied, "Oh, sorry. That was me talking to the wine."

160

Never forget 3 types of people in your life:

• who helped you in your difficult times

• who left you in your difficult times

• who put you in difficult times

119

Did you know that if you put your ear up a strangers leg you can hear them say:
What the fuck are you doing?!?

258

STOP PRESSING REPLAY ON THE THINGS THAT NEED TO BE DELETED FROM YOUR LIFE

140

I have seen the best of you, and the worst of you; and I choose both.

242

better
to loose
a lover
than
to love
a loser

134

when I see you I feel scared to touch you, when I touch you I feel scared to kiss you,
when I kiss you I feel scared to hug you,
when I hug you I feel scared to love you,
when I love you I feel scared to lose you ....

48

No! It's spelled "sexiest", not "sexist". Stupid bitch.

54

Sex? No thanks, my life fucks me every day

117

Music is life. That's why our hearts have beats.

120

better
to loose
a lover
than
to love
a loser

173

Never
make eye contact while eating banana.

339

How am I meant to control my life I can’t even control my hair

125

Let's do the rabbit thing.

115

Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.

628

The sex was so good even the neighbours had a cigarette.

283

I just awesomed all over the place.

317

You are only as good as the drinks you mix, the tables you dance on and the friends you roll with.

1

please god cure my hangover and i promise i will never drink again, also forgive me in advance for lying about never drinking again.

59

Men who say women belong in the kitchen obviously dont know what to do with them in the bedroom.

100

I'm okay with my crazy.

85

Worried I am wasting my life worrying about wasting my life.

74

a virgin getting pregnant, l can believe. but three wise men?

80

Never push a loyal person to the point where they no longer care

59

Do you believe in miracles?

Me neither.

I believe in risks, faith and tequila.

2

What if when we die the light at the end of the tunnel we see is just us being pushed out of another vagina?

163

If you expect the world to be fair with you because you are fair, you're fooling yourself. That's like expecting the lion not to eat you beacuse you didn't eat him.

230

She said "tell me something super dirty", I said "Your kitchen bitch!"

129

You are only as good as the drinks you mix, the tables you dance on and the friends you roll with.

524

having a vagina doesn't stop me from believing that my balls are bigger than yours.

201

STRESSED

spelled
backward
is

DESSERTS

320

"How do you know when it's over?"

"Maybe when you feel more in love with your memories than with the person standing right in front of you."

256

Do you believe in miracles?

Me neither.

I believe in risks, faith and tequila.

183

now i've got this feeling once again, i can't explain, you would not understand, this is not how i am

i... have become comfortably numb

186

Dear Ex,

Please don't be fooled by Adele, you'll never find someone like me.

377

I'm in competition
with no one..
have no desire
to play the game of being better than anyone..
just simply trying to be better than the person I was yesterday •

445

Telling a girl to "calm down" is like trying to baptize a cat.

566

Negative people need drama like oxygen. Stay positive and you'll take their breath away.

629

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