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I'm finally going to do it.
I am breaking up with it.
Bra? This is your last day of working.

7

This is to all the allergetic people out there who doesn't live alone on the north pole...

5

When you can no longer have it, you miss it and crave it even more!

Of course I am talking about guacamole. Damn allergies! What did you think I was talking about?

5

Got a burger today,
Five Guys have a big box of peanuts on the counter:

DO NOT TAKE BOX OUT OF STORE

5

Mowing the lawn til' your eyes get wet and puffy, your nose start running and your skin turns red and swollen...

4

Helpful Safety Tip for Allergy Sufferers:

Shoving a garden hose in your nose and turning it on in an attempt to lavage and cleanse your nasal cavities doesn't work!

My brain is now officially waterlogged.

4

The world is your oyster...

...unless you happen to be allergic to shellfish!

4

I started an All You Can Eat restaurant for people with food allergies. For 30 euros you get a glass of water and a photo of cocktail nuts.

3

I'd like to say I despise my seasonal allergies but the sneezes are almost orgasmic!

2

If I could divorce my sinuses I probably would!

0

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