danieljdam's Posts

I am not a normal broke.

I am a high-class broke.

I am
broqué.

Reposted from BoldDelight

janem803 likes this

Pardon my French, but watch le fuck out

Reposted from ErikSmit

ErikSmit likes this

Drunk in
love with you.
And also stone
cold sober.

Reposted from JodieT

Laughter
is the best medicine
unless you have diarrhea.

Reposted from kolelo

I tried seeing from your point of view... but, two heads don't fit up your ass.

Reposted from 2schaa

2schaa likes this

if a turtle loses its shell....

is it naked, or homeless?

Reposted from siouxz

I really wanna give you a hug but a hug leads into a kiss, a kiss leads into a lick, a lick leads into a suck, a suck leads into a fuck. Come here & give me a hug!

Reposted from 2schaa

janem803 likes this

I'M NOT PREGNANT!
BUT I'M STILL EATING FOR TWO, ME AND
MY INNER BITCH,
SHE LOVES TACOS.

Reposted from juneocallagh

juneocallagh likes this

I wish I had as much confidence as our cat does when he licks his ass in the middle of a room full of people.

Reposted from chipdicks

I wish you the best but you've already had me so it looks like you're out of luck.

Reposted from anonymous

just saw a guy at starbucks.
no iphone, no tablet, no laptop.

he just sat there drinking coffee.

fucking psychopath.

Reposted from jaybyrd

jaybyrd likes this

till death do us party

You're "sorry", and I watch porn for story lines.

Reposted from anonymous

Let's get
creative

on your couch.

Reposted from anonymous

Today I'll exercise
Today I'll
Today
To
T
Ta
Tac
Tacos

Reposted from BJcore

Donald Trump.
Donald T.
Don T.
don't.

Reposted from CleoBe

Today I caught myself smiling for no reason... then I realized I was thinking about pizza.

Reposted from chipdicks

Religion called. It wants you to stop doing stupid things in its name. Thanks

Reposted from LaurieAmy

Whining won't burn calories.

Reposted from anonymous

Bitch better
have my honey!!

• Winnie the Pimp*

Reposted from anonymous

PenSword72, Authlander, sis and sturli like this

You need three things in your life:
Whisky
Beer
& Wine

chipdicks, Authlander and sis like this