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You can't claim by taking advantage of all the benefits of freedom, while maintaining all the privileges of tyranny.

16

When you said "Friends with benefits"

I assumed you owned a coffee
store.

12

You do you
and i'm gonna
do me ...

Second thought, can you do me also?

4

What was one of my talents when I was younger? I was able to tell a person where lived, by naming a close bar. This really impressed my friend's Grandma. She came up with at least 4 locations.

11

Dear Ms.

We are pleased to inform you that your current healthcare is in effect until 6/30/17. If you wish to continue this policy after that date the cost is only $961.00 per month as a single person.

9

Amazon is just Wal-Mart but with the workers' misery hidden from view

10

the distant roaring of turbines in the sky always takes me on the wings of a plane.

8

it has been well said that tea is suggestive of a thousand wants, from which spring the decencies and luxuries of civilization

• agnes repplier

7

Benefits of dating me: You will be dating me.

I could go on but I think I have made my point.

6

If you're gonna be home, sick in bed, it's nice to have a litter of four week old kittens to keep you company:)

8

With all the scare tactics in the media, I feel pressured to start smoking so I can take advantage of all the health benefits of quitting.

7

M ore
E ndorphins
D oing
I nstantly
T aming
A nd
T otally
I ncrease
O n
N erves

5

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