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The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?'

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Do I enjoy being stuck in the house with nowhere to go? No

Will I actually start going places and being social when
the virus is under control?

Also No

16

The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?'

20

People will sink the whole ship just because they can't be the captain

16

Boldomatic
Love at first site

13

Healing doesn't mean the damage never existed, it means the damage no longer controls our lives

12

Whenever I see a commercial with a woman looking fully relaxed in a tub with 2 round slices of cucumber on her eyes
...
I wonder where the rest of the cucumber is.

11

I had a lot of stuff to do today.

Now I have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow.

14

“Its a trapezoid!!”

- Admiral Ackbar teaches geometry

8

don't feel bad for feeling bad, sometimes there are good reasons to feel bad and being happy would be highly inappropriate

11

There is no 'WE' in

chocolate

11

Chaos
is my friend today.

12

Faith is the place between hope and fear.

6

Family isn't always blood. It's the people in your life who want you in theirs

11

GOD GRANT ME A VACATION TO MAKE BEARABLE WHAT I CAN'T CHANGE, A FRIEND TO MAKE IT FUNNY AND THE WISDOM TO NOT GET MY KNICKERS IN A KNOT BECAUSE IT SOLVES NOTHING AND IT MAKES ME WALK FUNNY

8

It's not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve the right wine with it.

9

It is not insult from another that causes you pain.

It is the part of your mind that agrees with the insult.

Agree only with the truth about you, and you are free.

10

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