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meekmoney

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meekmoney

life should be more like hockey. when someone pisses you off, you just beat the shit out of them, then sit in a penalty box for 5 minutes.

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You know that voice that says, "Don't do that"?

Yeah, I don't have one of those.

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Me: I wanna look good today.
Body: No.
Hair: Nope.
Face: Nice try.

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shit, or get off the pot.

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My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.

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Sex with an ex.

Same as if you shower and wear your dirty underwear again.

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I don't like being told what to do unless I'm naked.

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I hate it when the voices in my head go silent...

I never know what those fuckers are planning...

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