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jakester

i witnessed kidnapping the other day. then the kid woke up. dont even ask me about therapist encounter

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jakester

Chuck Norris can plant an apple seed, grow oranges from it, and squeeze grape juice out of them

5

If a ghost
is trying
to kill you, does he want you as a friend?

5

Can you run at the campsite? No, you only RAN.

Because it's past tents

4

Language hides feelings.

Sometimes you must listen to your feelings and not what others say to you

4

I haven't swam competitively
since I was a sperm.

4

THE INVENTION OF THE SHOVEL ...
IS TRUELY GROUND BREAKING !

4

We are all made of stardust so it's just natural that our future is somewhere out there amongst the stars!

THAT is our true home and THAT is where we belong!

4

And on the ninth day, God deleted all of his social media accounts...

4

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