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ellin97

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ellin97

"Are you cold?" No dumb ass, I'm on fucking vibrate mode.

4

I'm not ignoring your calls. I just enjoy my ringtone.

4

When a package says "easy open" and you end up using scissors, knife, hammer, gun and a chainsaw just to get it open...

4

I'm not clumsy. The floor just hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies and the walls get in my way.

2

No, keep talking!

I always yawn when I'm interested...

2

Don't make me angry and then tell me to calm down.

That's like shooting someone and then wondering why he's bleeding.

2

Accidental eye contact can either be cute, awkward or creepy...

2

IN CASE OF FIRE
DO NOT USE
ELEVATOR

use water

2

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