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Posts Liked by NJoyHope

I'M NOT PREGNANT!
BUT I'M STILL EATING FOR TWO, ME AND
MY INNER BITCH,
SHE LOVES TACOS.

80

if a turtle loses its shell....

is it naked, or homeless?

76

Two corners of one mouth curling up and reaching for the eyes. When they make it, you've made it.

49

Sun goes down earlier for short people.

279

finally friday.

202

MONTAG

Das "S" steht für supergut gelaunt.

29

Lieber Augenringe als gar kein Schmuck!

24

you will never look like the girl in the magazine, the girl in the magazine doesn't even look like the girl in the magazine.

131

Und was machen wir jetzt?

Jetzt kaufen wir uns ein Fernglas.

Und dann?

Dann schauen wir weiter.

34

Er steht
auf sie.
Sie steht
auf ihn.
Ich steh daneben.

28

I'm not crazy, my reality is just diffrent from yours

120

The milk has a Feb. 14th expiration date, and that's the only thing in my house with a valentines date.

99

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murdereres, if you do find one, what's your plan?

123

+

Happy birthday Helvetia

29

I'm at that awkward age where half my friends are in love and having babies and the other half are too drunk to even find their phones.

187

I will never be a morning person.

The moon and i are too much in love.

176

vitamine sind gesund.

kalorien schmecken besser.

28

Kiss me like your ex is watching

211

worry about your character, not your reputation.

your character
is who you are

your reputation
is who people
think you are.

15

Friends are like underwear, always near you
Good friends are like condom, always protecting you
Best friends are like viagra, lift you up when you are down

40

I WANT TO HAVE TEXT WITH YOU.

257

Your ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

240

Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate.

620

Ladies, lets take extra long to look stunning for all the guys we'll be ignoring tonight.

137

LET'S DO SOME "WE SHOULDN'T BE DOING THIS" THINGS.

262

I like to be alone.
But I would rather be alone with you.

270

others have sex in the kitchen, I eat in bed

367

You look like something
I draw with my left hand.

959

laundry today
or
naked tomorrow

577

I don't miss you

I miss the person I was when I was with you

42

You're the
one I want
to want me.

61

Do you ever have a plan for the day and suddenly it's 4pm and you've achieved literally nothing?

53

SOMETIMES YOU LOVE PEOPLE IN A LANGUAGE THEY CANNOT UNDERSTAND.

64

you have the age of pompei but you look new like dubai

19

Weed is the bacon of plants.

35

*picture of Amish Christmas lights

19

You can stay, but your clothes must go...

26

Hardest thing ever? Controlling your laughter at serious times.

25

Was sagt ein grosser Stift zum kleinen Stift?

- Wachsmalstift.

39

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once!

64

I Was Born To Be Awesome, Not Perfect.

122

The world is full of nice people. If you can't find one...

be one.

324

KLAUEN DEINE ELTERN?

SIEHST SO MITGENOMEN
AUS

40

Ich gebe dem Tag die Schuld.

Schliesslich hat der angefangen.

80

my heart says: summer

my body says: no

203

ein leben ohne kuchen ist möglich aber sinnlos.

49

I always start phone conversations with "my phone is about to die.." just so people don't waste my time.

238

Um diesem Arbeitstag etwas mehr Ausdruck zu verleihen, rühre ich jetzt meinen Kaffee mit dem Mittelfinger um.

67

Wenn WhatsApp anzeigt

(schreibt...aber nicht Dir)

sind wir alle am Arsch.

39

The prettiest people do the ugliest things.

284

Ich selber brauche gar keinen Kaffee zum Leben. Ich brauche ihn, damit andere überleben.

34

Manchmal denk ich wirklich, ich bin ein Stuhl und muss mit jedem Arsch klarkommen.

41

I just don't have the energy to shit butterflies and piss rainbows today.

178

Sei immer Du selbst!

Außer, Du bist ein fröhlicher Morgenmensch. Dann geh mir nicht auf'n Sack!

38

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