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Posts Liked by lisemorner

Gambling addiction helplines would be so much more effective if every 10th caller was a winner.

32

Let's go camping.

In a hotel.
With a pool. And a spa.

427

Ironically, the fight between the mind and the heart always ends up hurting the liver.

417

some are playing hard to get while i'm playing hard to want

285

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone?... That's common sense leaving your body.

395

My new girlfriend Marylin said it would be O.K. to have a small penis. I would prefer her to have none.

11

I tripped and fell in love.

Don't worry, I brushed that shit off.

409

A lot of people cry when they cut onions, the trick is not to form an emotional bond.

396

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