Search for #hashtags, @writers or keywords

Posts Liked by lindseyjeanise

when you change the way you look at things
the things you look at change

81

#27 How to
annoy people

Tell random people their alleged "accent" isn't fooling anyone.

8

you're the only person i know who can make "yes byrd" sound like screw you.

18

this is an excellent time for you to become a missing person.

24

I'm just
a conscious
bag of meat
clinging
to some bones.

25

i will chase you around the moons of Jupiter before i give you up.

12

you're
beautiful

15

i feel so proud when my friends tell me their parents love me. like damm right they love me, i'm a fucking delight.

12

FUCK

you me off
_____ _____ _____
| | | | | |
|____ | |____ | |____ |

15

contrast creates balance

Learn to get along with
people who do not
think the same
way as you.
That is
vital.
•••

16

Knowledge
that does
not change
behaviour
is useless

37

If you believe in yourself,
others will believe in you too.
Confidence starts with self confidence.

13

Touch me with
Enough roughness
To remind me I'm
still alive
And with enough tenderness
To remind me why...!!

36

with a fuck fuck here
and a fuck fuck there
here a fuck
there a fuck
I don't give a fuck fuck!

32

I want to cuddle the fuck out of you right now ~

20

$| | | | | | | | ___|___ ___|___ | | | | | O _ | | _ o~ | | /| | | |\ | | / \ | | / \ | | ______ | | ______ |$

37

Choose your habits carefully they decide your future

12

I promised myself I would never fall in love with you. But it's 4 am and we're laughing way too hard and I felt happy for the first time in a long time and I knew I was screwed.

28

Disappointment cannot
exist without expectation.

32

What Susie says
of Sally
says more of Susie
than of Sally.

Remember that.

164

Today a feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships.....apparently "in HD" was not the right answer...

106

I wish I could trade my heart for another liver so I could drink more and care less.

78

Calm down, browser.
I cant make a connection either.

128

If women ruled this world, there would be no wars.

Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other.

202

Sorry, but your password must contain a capital letter, two numbers,
a symbol, an inspiring message, a spell,
a gang sign,
a hieroglyph and the blood of a virgin.

170

I've never seen a Mcdonalds or a Burger King under construction.

They just show up.

78

A fuck must be earned. I can't go down the street with a bucket of fucks, giving them out to everyone.
If I feel that you've earned it, I will give a fuck.

132

you can't have both feet on the ground and kick ass at the same time

146

FLY LIKE AN EAGLE.

FUCK LIKE A RABBIT.

111

Ironically, the fight between the mind and the heart always ends up hurting the liver.

82

Let's do the rabbit thing.

115

ride bold.
or dont ride at all...

41

I Was Born To Be Awesome, Not Perfect.

122

I never needed you. I wanted you.

There's a difference.

185

If you're looking for sympathy, you'll find it in the dictionary between shit and syphillis!

111

Find someone who knows you're not perfect but treats you
as if you are.

182

The trouble with jogging is, by the time you realize you're not fit for it, it's too far to walk back •

105

You make me smile...

And also super horny, but that's not the point.

203

Let's go camping.

In a hotel.
With a pool. And a spa.

136

A lot of people cry when they cut onions, the trick is not to form an emotional bond.

213

that awkward moment when I'm drunk
and you're still ugly

125

Everyone's curious

But no one really cares.

178

I wish I had boobs so people would stop making eye contact with me.

146

A baby's laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear.

Unless it's 3am.

And you're home alone.

And you don't have a baby.

240

The sex was so good even the neighbours had a cigarette.

283

Ladies, lets take extra long to look stunning for all the guys we'll be ignoring tonight.

137

Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.

628

LET'S DO SOME "WE SHOULDN'T BE DOING THIS" THINGS.

262

You remind me of my big toe, cause i'm going to bang you on every piece of furniture I own

273

Today, 2 year olds can unlock an iPhone, open and close their favorite apps all by themselves.

When I was that age,
I was eating dirt.

169

I'm sick about all the Irish stereotypes!
As soon as I finish this drink, I'm punching someone.

218

I like the nights.

Some of my best days were nights.

241

10% of conflicts are due to differences in opinion.

90% are due to wrong tone of voice.

279

Try to be less of a fucking piece of shit than you were yesterday.

- Buddha

295

I just awesomed all over the place.

317

Sun goes down earlier for short people.

279

If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.

220

Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.

286

Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.

396

THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.

416

I HOPE YOUR DAY IS AS NICE AS YOUR BUTT

250

You look like something
I draw with my left hand.

959

thought of the day: no

4

Show me the candy before I get in the van.

19

I am
just as
not me
anymore
as you
are not
you

33

what are you doing in my mouth?

13

To be is to be perceived and so to know thyself is only possible through the eyes of the other. The nature of our immortal lives is in the consequences of our words and deeds that go on apportioning themselves throughout all time. Our lives are not our own; from womb to tomb, we are bound to others, past and present, and by each crime and every kindness we birth our future.

-Somni451

15

I AM MY PROBLEM, BUT ALSO MY SOLUTION

16

I love autumn in California… watching the leaves change color because they’re on fire.

8

I have enough anxiety for 3 people

6

I quite
fancy
inciting
a riot.

25

an apple a day keeps the doctor away.

but if the doctor's cute, forget the fruit.

16

when that first sip of vodka touches your soul.

14

"I hereby find you guilty
of murder and sentence you to death by electric chair.
What happens next will shock you."

25

Where is the love?

42

I am the unexplored.
I am the unknown.
I am the infinte doubt in chances never taken
And stories never told
If ever so I should be sought i shall be found In the most sound of places I am the timber breeze
I am the wildlife and the wind
I am colorful and falling
I am the autumn tree letting go of dying leaves
I am drifting above a footpath thick and faded from green to overgrown this winding wooded river is the trail that takes me home

27

?•.?•?

?

25

Bad luck is not knowing how lucky you really are.

34

DOn't
quIT

85

I had such big
plans for today.
I was going to
get off the sofa
and everything.

46

I'm having four eggs for breakfast so I can have just one single carrot for lunch and my colleagues will think of me as a very happy, healthy person.

9

Friday every day.

13

what in God's cock is going on here?

13

With everything that
cartoons led me to believe,
I really thought I would have slipped on a banana
skin by now.

24

show more

About Help Contact Copyright Privacy Terms