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Posts Liked by huiripu

It's better to be late, than to arrive ugly.

190

The
only thing stronger than a mother's love is a
garlic breath •

103

It's not illegal. It's just frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.

1546

Therapist..?
You mean bartender!?

41

Unconcious girls don't say no.

17

I just took a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it.

360

Menstrual cycle jokes are not funny. Period.

30

SLEEP IS THE BABY MAMA OF DEATH

14

*

I am a creature of the night.

178

You can't argue with a good blow job.

27

I'm gonna kill you.
Hahaha.
No, seriously. Run.

50

Sad story: my favorite Italian chef died. In other words, he pasta way.

120

You are more awesome than a monkey wearing a tuxedo

210

SOMETIMES I THINK SOMETIMES I DON'T

40

Aber das Gänseblümchen hat doch gesagt, du liebst mich..!

34

Sex? No thanks, my life fucks me every day

117

I love listening to lies when I know the truth...

226

swiss

+

355

touché.

274

Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.

628

It's better to be late, than to arrive ugly.

449

I like big butts
and I
cannot
lie.

10

YOUR FACE,

I love that shit.

44

I'M NOT WAVING

I AM DROWNING

18

Put your "faith" between my legs.

77

It's winter.
Call me old fashioned but I think your shorts should be longer than your vagina.

42

what if you just started licking the dentists fingers while they were in your mouth...

160

Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to.

Unless you' re in prison.

161

New features! Hall of Fame, writer feeds and posts directly under profiles. Also, Popular is now
more current and includes only recent posts. Check it out.

129

i am as motivated as the guy who drew the japanese flag.

263

Never
make eye contact while eating banana.

339

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