Posts Liked by dezentunnormal

Ich scheiss auf Fitness-Studios!

Nach 1/2 Stunde auf dem Indoor-Spielplatz schwitze ich wie ein Schwein und bin körperlich am Ende.

in victory you deserve champagne

in defeat you need it

Krieg ist ein Zustand, bei dem Menschen aufeinander schiessen, die sich nicht kennen, auf Befehl von Menschen, die sich wohl kennen, aber nicht aufeinander schiessen.

Today is the perfect day to buy ski boots!

"He ich ha kei Ahnig, us was für eme Speck die bache isch. Oder wie seit mä? Us welem Holz gschnitzt?"

Wann, wie, wo gibts die ersten Photos zu sehen?

The blurred picture around the smartphone is called life.

I don't need insperation to get drunk. But i need to be drunk to get inspiration.

Maybe accident doesn't always
mean mistake.

Betrunken flirten ist wie hungrig einkaufen..

~<~>~<~>~<~>~ M~MASTER
O ~OF
M~MIRACLES

~<~>~<~>~<~>~

If you don't have
anything nice to say
then don't say
anything at all

basically I'm just a webcam girl with awesome background music

...when all the other...

...you do it?

first comes work then even more work

I HOPE YOUR KIDS WON'T BE LIKE YOU.

a lie for a lie makes the moral world die

Mom: As long as you will have your feet under my table. You do what i want.

I: Yeahr modern slavery is born.

hate the sun light

love thr moon light

Hey assholes, if you don't have anything nice to say...don't say anything at all.

It's crazy how much you can care about just one person.

Mein Auto schickt mir andauernd Selfies von sich...

Unsere Mannschaft hat ein starkes Team.

Keeping
Out of the
Lime
Light
Earns
Greatness and
Gravitas

$Sex is like math. Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray you don't multiply!$

I won't be impressed by technology until the day I can close the YouTube app but the music continues playing.

Never
make eye contact while eating banana.

when
nothing
goes
right,

go
left.

Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.

Sun goes down earlier for short people.

LISTEN TO SILENCE

My other bag is

Louis Vuitton

Smile today, tomorrow could be worse!

Vaginas are like the weather; if it's wet, it's time to go inside.

Only two sentences can change the mood of a woman
"I love you" and "50% discount"

Roses are red, my screen is blue.

And I'm sitting here thinking WTF did I do

$--------__@ __@ __@ __@ __~@ ----- _`\<,_ _`\<,_ _`\<,_ _`\<,_ _`\<,_ ---- ( * )/ ( * ) ( * )/ ( * ) ( * )/ ( * ) ( * )/ ( * ) ( * )/ ( * ) """"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""$

Meatballs in German is "Hackfleischbällchen".

Great.
I want some now.

Alcohol should be served in Capri Sun pouches. When you can't get the straw in the hole you've had enough.

Welcome to my world!
Now
get out.

You look like something
I draw with my left hand.

Some people are just beautifully wrapped pieces of shit.

I like sleeping because it's like being dead but without the commitment.

Auch ein Poet wie
Friedrich Schiller hätte wegen seiner deutsche Sprache bei einem Bold Contest keine Chance.

I don't watch soccer...

If I want to spend 90 minutes watching people struggling to score, I take my friends to a bar.