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Posts Liked by dameuta

i'm ugly and i'm proud of it

5

Porn is so unrealistic. I just took a shower with my boyfriend and all he did was stand in the corner shivering for 20 minutes while he handed me a bunch of shampoos.

131

Why do people say heads up when you should duck?

147

For $7 I will go to the funeral of someone you hate and start a slow clap.

42

Dad Dad what is the purpose of a condom?

To avoid this kind of question..

23

How I talk:
25% swearing
25% sarcasm
50% a combination of both

31

people: you've changed

me: well i couldn't stay a sperm forever could i

29

i need google in my head and anti-virus in my heart

10

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