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Posts Liked by claireybeary

No one get more real than parents. They compliment you behind your back but talk shit to your face. That's real.

55

Me: I want a magical unicorn for Christmas!

Santa: Be realistic.

Me: OK, I want 5 minutes to myself each day to have my coffee hot and pee in peace.

Santa: What colour unicorn would you like?

185

My favorite mythical creature is the happy bitch in tampon commercials.

237

Some talk to you in their free time
&
some free time to talk to you

270

If you have to ask if it's too early to drink wine, you're an amateur and we can't be friends.

189

A world

with a little less selfies

and a little more selfless.

244

i think therefore

i don't have much in common with a lot of people

236

Half of my feelings are doubts about the other half of my feelings.

232

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