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Posts Liked by Aitchie

You can't buy happiness - but you can buy drinks and that's pretty close.

60

Last year I joined a support group for antisocial people. We haven't met yet.

77

I may not be everyone's cup of tea, but I'm someones double vodka!

41

If I have ten ice cubes and you have eleven oranges, how many pancakes can fit on the roof? Purple. Because aliens don't wear hats.

126

Life is NOT like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos - what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

131

relationship starts with ...
"can we talk?"

and ends with ...
"we need to talk."

40

THIS IS BY FAR YOUR MOST FUCKED UP IDEA EVER... I'LL BE THERE IN 10MINUTES.

208

I'm gonna ignore you so hard you'll start to doubt your own existance.

73

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