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Prove me wrong, please.

13

Courtesy is given.

Respect is earned.

21

"I hereby find you guilty
of murder and sentence you to death by electric chair.
What happens next will shock you."

25

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?

WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'

ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?

WITNESS: My name is Susan!

16

i'm going to leave my winter coat, and i won't even need a sweater. i'm going to sit here on a boat, cause it's time for some sunny weather.

14

It turns out that common courtesy is not so common afterall.

15

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

13

ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?

WITNESS: July 18th.

ATTORNEY: What year?

WITNESS: Every year.

12

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?

WITNESS: By death.

ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

WITNESS: Take a guess.

11

"Manscaping"

It's not just good hygiene. It's good manners as well!

11

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?

WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard

ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.

11

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM

ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.

11

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