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funnyposts

I farted in the Apple store and everyone got mad. Not my fault they don't have Windows.

6

Most people want a perfect relationship. I just want a hamburger that looks like the ones in commercials.

3

That awkward moment when you're the first one at the lunch table and you look like a loner.

2

Giving up doesn't always mean your weak. Sometimes it just means you're strong enough to let go.

2

It's nice when someone remembers small details about you, not because you always remind them, but just because they care.

1

People: "I can hear your music..."

Me: "me too"

1

I've always wanted my texts to be the ones you look down at and smile. ......then run into a pole.

1

Me: hey.
In my mind: omg did i really just send that, what if i'm annoying them, i really should stop, they hate me, omg i'm so embarrassed

1

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