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Posts Liked by wolfie

leave my head
or
start paying rent

103

http://ster.no.tx

4

When
I'm flirting
with you,
please cooperate •

101

What doesn't kill us makes our drinks stronger

73

FREE HUGS

[$50 to let go]

37

nudity isn't
vulgar. reality is.

10

I love you, every single byte. Your pixels are a million to none. I fell hardcase over headphones for you. Too bad I have to layaway.

31

I hate hipsters. Their smug faces, vegan diet, tiny feet & sawdust bedding. No wait. Hamsters. I hate hamsters.

51

ambivalent?
well, yes and no.

14

nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know ,,,

8

We should probably get therapy for all of these issues we conceal with sarcasm.

22

rebooting life;

Ctrl + Alt + Whiskey

18

type
matters

9

3 horrible things in life:

1) Seeing your mom cry.

2) Seeing the love of your life fall in love with somebody else.

3) Slow Internet.

65

dont fall for someone if there not prepared to catch you

7

I hate it when I do push-ups and I lose count after 1.000...

10

I'd like to offer moral support, but I have questionable morals.

95

It's not illegal. It's just frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.

1546

Listening to someone's heartbeat.

200

Handicapped buddhists who were born on a Monday evening get 5% discount on midget penguins if they submit this voucher using a pre-stamped yellow envelope.
P.O. box: "Sick of Ads"

14

"Who are you and how did you get in here?"

"I'm a locksmith and... I'm a locksmith...

25

Knowledge is power and power corrupts.

So study hard and be evil.

40

Never do anything you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.

35

WISHING YOU
PEACE, LOVE
AND COPING SKILLS

46

I sometimes imagine a naked, sweaty fat ass posting such teenage girl stuff. Makes it somewhat more bearable...

16

The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.

5

Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.

41

One spelling mistake can destroy your life.
A Husband sent this to his wife: I'm having a wonderful time wish you were her."

15

don't worry what people think. they don't do it very often.

20

I'm glad it's warm enough to ride a bike since I can't afford any other form of transportation.

14

nothing new can come into your life unless you're grateful for what you already have.

3

Life doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful

2

Danke für meine Aufmerk-samkeit!

9

WORK NOW

CRY LATER

18

I'd suck a pizza's dick.

16

recently, i called my mother at 3 am. just to let her know how it is, when she calls me on sunday 1 pm.

279

silence is sometimes the best answer

16

you are in your bed and i am in mine. one of us are in the wrong place

15

the worst part about being sad is that you don't even know what makes you happy anymore

14

Things I hate:

1. Writing
2. Irony
3. Lists

40

i've lost my love but found myself instead

20

Let's go for a rum!

230

remember to forget

35

A dirty
mind is
a terrible
thing to
waste •

19

little secret

27

Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.

36

SOMETHING ABOUT TODAY MAKES ME WANT TO BE HUNGOVER TOMORROW

21

I'm not Cynical.

I'm just experienced.

••••

11

Dear Noah,

we could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving 'till 5.

Sincerly,
Unicorns

127

I don't belong here.

20

Ein tschechischer Kraftfahrer geht zum Augenarzt um seinen Sehtest aufzufrischen.

Vor ihm auf der Tafel steht:

C Z S C W Y N S T A C Z E C

Der Augenarzt fragt ihn: "Und, können Sie das lesen?"

Der Kraftfahrer erwidert: "Lesen?", "Ich kenne den Typen persönlich!"

11

Where did little Susie go after the bombing?

Everywhere

20

I wish my life had background music
then I would know what the hell was going on

59

FATE L'AMORE NON FATE LA DIETA.

9

forever
is composed of nows

21

i play the keyboard in a band called the internet

318

If you can’t enjoy being sober, you have work to do in your life.

5

PUT YOURSELF IN A POSITION WHERE YOU NEED NO FRIENDS

12

the quieter you become,
the more you can hear.

12

Life is like a Poker game.
If you don't have a partner, you better have a good hand.

11

*

when night comes

31

step aside coffee
this is a job for alcohol

26

hello [trash]

11

You invited me to the party.
You should have known better.

12

Don't complain.
Don't explain.

4

we live in the hearts we leave behind.

3

Respect old people.

They gratuated school without Google and Wikipedia.

136

What we have left behind will be the only proof we ever existed.

7

ego aside.

14

The sex was so good even the neighbours had a cigarette.

327

ask my coffee mug

23

If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?

10

and then we grew up

23

YOU ARE AN ANIMAL, TOO

27

o

VINYL RULES

21

FIGHT FOR YOUR WORLD,
NOT YOUR COUNTRY.

147

«i think
i think
i think
a little
too often»

37

S A D

5

All this happened, more or less.

2

It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love.

1

Don't let anybody tell you, you can't, just because they can't..

14

I wished people looked like their personalities

33

A shitty day is no excuse for a shitty attitude.

Anyway, good luck with that.

11

I just want to feel like I’m not wasting my life away.

13

sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding the other person is a complete idiot.

24

My inner lazy dog ate the early bird.

30

What plan?

7

It's 3am and this is the best I can do.

6

Let's do the rabbit thing.

115

BEAUTIFUL THINGS HAPPEN WHEN YOU DISTANCE YOURSELF FROM

THE NEGATIVE SHIT

372

I wish I could trade my heart for another liver so I could drink more and care less.

313

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