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Posts Liked by magdimus

Can someone please send that North Korean bloke a fruit basket or something before he launches his stupid?

38

ISSEY MIYAKE WIE HOSE

8

I think my problem is that I have really fantastic bad ideas.

95

c'est la vie

[ zäh-lah-wie ]

12

Eau
de
Fuck

69

due to budget cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off •

15

Tu, was sich in deinem Herzen richtig anfühlt!

Kritisiert wirst du so oder so...

22

Alle wollen individuell sein.
Aber wehe, jemand ist anders...

28

Das Leben kann Spuren von Müssen enthalten

29

"DO NOT TOUCH"

MUST BE ONE OF THE MOST SCARIEST THINGS TO READ IN BRAILLE..

87

- hast du
das aus der
Lügenpresse?

- NEIN!!!
aus dem Internet!

13

I don't work
out, just so I have something to regret
on my deathbed.

63

I'm an animal in bed.

More specifically a koala. I can sleep up to 22 hours a day.

146

thank goodness i don't have to hunt for my food!
i don't even know where tacos live!

24

ver
rutscht

4

Auf der Suche nach der Stille in mir

13

Teach me things. Introduce me to different authors, artists, and music. That shit is sexy as fuck.

116

In einer besseren Welt

7

you hate me at "hello"

4

Einhorn-Filet

6

like a one legged man in an arse kicking contest, I'm not so good at thinking ahead.

71

Man soll sich nicht über Dinge ärgern, denn das ist ihnen völlig egal.

(Euripides)

17

Der Fisch
an sich
ist ja eher

schwanzgesteuert.

22

The WiFi in a café is called "Martin Router King". Well, what can I say?
I have a stream!

12

anti alles für immer - dank dir.

20

präventives Frustessen

21

YOUR WORDS WILL LEAVE AN IMPRINT OF MEMORIES WHICH STORY'S YET BE TOLD

119

DIE ALTERNATIVEN ZUR ARBEIT LIEGEN AUF DER STRASSE.

7

The
dog
ate my excuse

54

If we all pretend tomorrow is Sunday we might just get away with it.

172

how to go on

11

i have this bumper sticker that says "honk if you think i'm sexy" and then i wait at green lights until i feel better about myself.

171

be
you
tiful

11

they told me
I couldn't,

that's why I did.

129

FUCK

[ ] IT
[ ] ME
[ ] YOU
[x] OFF
[ ] THEM
[ ] THIS
[ ] EVERYBODY
[ ] EVERYTHING

146

If you find it necessary to judge me by my past, don't be surprised if I find it necessary to put you there.

59

Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate.

620

Voices in your head - normal

Listening to them - common

Arguing with them - acceptable

Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM

273

I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.

310

Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.

396

Chocolate is a great example of food, that looks like crap but tastes like heaven.

18

Just about anything can sound dirty if you think about it.

16

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

326

a horse with no fame

6

Gay, straight, who cares?

Love is equal!

13

you are what u
post.

16

Ihr glaubt ja gar nicht wie eklig eine Frau es findet, wenn man Ihr am Teller tatsächlich mal romantisch Fleischbällchen mit der Nase zuschiebt.

14

little girls with dreams

become women
with vision

9

They say "follow your heart" but if your heart is in a million pieces, which piece do you follow?

10

Everyone says you only fall in love once, but that's not true, because everytime I see you, I fall in love all over again.

15

Kaltes, klares Wasser
Kaltes - kaltes
Kaltes - hmmm
Kaltes/Wasser
Kaltes/Wasser
Kaltes/Wasser
Kaltes, klares Wasser
Kaltes
Kalt und klar
Kaltes, klares Wasser
Kaltes - kaltes
über meinen Körper

4

"Kannst Du
italienisch ?"

"Nur essen,
aber das sehr gut."

34

Using a random word as a way of ending what you're saying;

"And she is so pretty and nice and talented and perfect and gah! Potato!"

7

in
the
lame
of love

4

100% of non-
smokers die too.

184

My middle finger salutes you.

6

it's so quiet in the office today, I can hear myself not working

12

You like what I hate.
I like what you hate.
So technically both our opinions are irrelevant...

20

Weihnachten dieses Jahr ganz traditionell feiern.

Schlafen, fressen, saufen und fernsehen.

Also wie jedes Wochenende.

26

oriGINal

11

just because it's a bad idea, doesn't mean it's not going to be a good time...

116

teeth:
because blow jobs need to come with a gentle reminder of who's really in charge

95

YOU SHOULD STOP TELLING LIES ABOUT ME.

OR I WILL START TO TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT YOU.

144

You don't have to like me but at least base it on your own opinion, not someone else's.

7

FEED

YOUR

TALENT

11

If I stole your heart & you stole mine, wouldn't that be the perfect crime?

22

I wish I had a theme
song that played
whenever I did something awesome.

14

Some people are old at 18 and some are young at 90...Time is a concept that humans created

12

Never mistake silence for ignorance, calmness for acceptance, or kindness for weakness.

14

I am constantly making the decision between being a good person or being a sarcastic asshole.

27

School dress code is dumb. Girls can't show their shoulders? What guy is gonna look at a girl and be like "Damn, thats a FINE shoulder."

8

before you SPEAK, LISTEN. before you ACT, THINK. before you QUIT, TRY. before you SHIT, look for PAPER.

6

If no one thinks you
can

then you have to

5

I don't need a perfect relationship, I just need someone as weird as me

6

Wenn man MacGyver rückwärts anschaut,
sieht man einen Menschen,
der einen Hubschrauber demontiert,
weil er einen Zahnstocher braucht.

22

"Papi, schnell.
Da ist ein Monster
unter meinem Bett."

"Es gibt kei
OH NEIN !
ES HAT MEINE BEINE !
Nein mach nur Spaß.
Es frisst nur Kinder.
Schlaf jetzt, gute Nacht."

31

"to do is to be"
- nietzsche

"to be is to do"
- kant

"do be do be do"
- sinatra

41

That annoying moment when you are texting someone and Auto Correct decides to join the conversation.

42

"so eine verdammte scheisse!!! über den verfickten rand gemalt! und der arschlochmistdrecksfotzen stift ist auch noch abgebrochen! fahr doch zur hölle!"

ja, mandalas ausmalen entspannt mich wahnsinnig -.-

30

du schläfst bestimmt immer auf luftpolsterfolie, weil du sonst nichts zu knallen hast :)

37

90% of my socks are single, and you don't see them crying about it

105

currently...
I'm fucking busy
-and unfortunately it's not the other way around.

43

© @ ® € £ € $ $

15

Before talking, Please connect the tongue to the brain…

9

I just found out, that I can make calls with the iPhone.

17

wer glaubt etwas zu sein, hört auf etwas zu werden.

17

Break my own heart before i let you...

7

This is who i am....

Take it or leave it

6

falling in love with someone with the intention of changing them completely is like buying a beautiful castle and turning it into a parking lot

5

dear NSA, my computer crashed. please send the backup to my known IP.

thanks for cooperation

18

Danke all den gutherzigen und hilfsbereiten Menschen auf dieser Welt!

Es gibt Sie noch.

7

GREAT MINDS DISCUSS IDEAS.

AVERAGE MINDS
DISCUSS EVENTS.

SMALL MINDS DISCUSS PEOPLE.

9

Opinions are facts marinated in bullshit.

112

I wish more things could be blamed on autocorrect.

149

I don’t need you to fix my problems, I need you to just listen.

16

Think training's hard?

Try losing.

9

Sometimes it can be fun to randomly shout:

"Hey, Asshole!"

in a crowd, just to see who turns around.

41

If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done...

6

Habe heute einem Mann auf dem Frauenparkplatz gesagt, dass ich Menschen wie ihn grossartig finde,
die so offen zu ihrer Transsexualität stehen.

Sein Gesichtsausdruck:: Unbezahlbar...!

43

Everybody should stop making fun of Justin Bieber.
That poor girl...

61

Scientists say the universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons. They forgot to mention morons...

67

While waiting for the right person, have fun with the wrong one.

94

I don't have a Facebook or Twitter account, so I just go around announcing out loud what I'm doing at random times. I've got three followers so far but I think at least two are cops.

135

The creative adult is the child who survived.

491

i live in a fantastic world where baby unicorns poo cotton candy and quoting one's sources is an art.

13

recently, i called my mother at 3 am. just to let her know how it is, when she calls me on sunday 1 pm.

279

Beziehungsstatus:

Ich liebe mich.

Vielleicht schliesst sich irgendwann einer an.

19

if you succeed at everything you do, you are not taking enough risk.

20

*

I am a creature of the night.

178

Abends gehe ich oft mit einer Schüssel Nudelsalat spazieren, um den Eindruck zu erwecken, ich hätte Freunde, die mich zu Parties einladen.

13

this is my world. fiction in reality

125

sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding the other person is a complete idiot.

24

I wish I could trade my heart for another liver so I could drink more and care less.

313

BEAUTIFUL THINGS HAPPEN WHEN YOU DISTANCE YOURSELF FROM

THE NEGATIVE SHIT

372

Let's do the rabbit thing.

115

What if we are all particles on a grilled cheese sandwich?

237

i play the keyboard in a band called the internet

318

Habe einen tollen Menschen gefunden.
Dass ich ihn nur im Spiegel sehe, stört mich nicht!

14

it's all or nothing or something else.

10

Tipp an die Mädels:
"Weniger ist mehr" bezieht sich auf den Malkasten für euer Gesicht, nicht auf irgendwelche Kleidungsfetzen.

22

MAKE PEACE WITH IMPERFECTION.

7

Home sweet mess.

3

sometimes
smarties
are
the
answer.

9

Einen Kaffee bitte.

To Go?

Nein, to stolper and to kipp on the shirt and with extra Schaum bitte.

67

Fuck you,
very much.

54

THIS IS BY FAR YOUR MOST FUCKED UP IDEA EVER... I'LL BE THERE IN 10MINUTES.

208

Home sweet mess.

264

THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.

428

I just awesomed all over the place.

428

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