Posts Liked by letterend

Man kann ziemlich einfach das Geschlecht von Mandarinen bestimmen.

Die einen sind ohne Grund sauer, die anderen spritzen dir ohne Vorwarnung ins Auge.

Heroes

just for one day

I'll wait

oh darling,
after all,
all you have is yourself

Damals - als sich alles noch um Pickel und Petting gedreht hat. Good times.

Let's meet in our dreams tonight.

When
people
let
us
down,

up.
back
us
help
pets
our

Crumpled clothes on
a floor. Shoes in a hallway.
This seems too easy, but
I probably shouldn't say
that out loud.

Humanity...

We made it through the darkest days of a black plague only to trap ourselves in a digital cage lost Within the information age.

Animals share with us the privilege of having a soul.

You're suprised, when people can't touch their toes..

if there is nothing left, just look on the (b)right side

ein hoch auf die, die nichts zu sagen haben und den mund halten.

Was liegt am Strand und redet sehr undeutlich?

Eine Nuschel.

Nee, Spass. Es ist Till Schweiger.

I'm not saying 'Let's kill all the stupid people.'

I'm just saying 'Let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem sort itself out.'

YGOLOHCYSP ESREVER

Restes auprès de celui qui fait de toi une priorité dans sa vie.

He brought
the sun
to its knees
every night

And he gathered
the stars
every morning

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Mix with people who have good attitude

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

ScArY
fUcKiNG
cLoWn

I'll show you mine if you show me some vodka.

keep calm and disappoint your family

People leave. How they leave is what stays.

I'm not good at push ups, pull ups, or sit ups.

I'm pretty good at fuck ups tho.

Why is there no way of referring to someone as a reptilian shapeshifter, without being called a conspiracy theorist?!

$____________________ | | | -- o -- | / \ | + | _|_ | ___ __ | | | . ' ' . | | __ | | /^\| | | | | | | | | ___ | | ____| | | | | | | | |__| | | |_| | | | \_| |.| | _ | | | | | | | | | |..| |_| |_| : =[]-------'$

If you ever feel sad, just remember the world is about 4.543 billion years old and that you somehow managed to exist at the same time as David Bowie.

Who would like to learn Roman numerals?

I for one.

Older single ladies,
Older single ladies,
Older single ladies,
Older single ladies,
Older single ladies,
Now pick your cats up!

Do drunk blind people have double vision?

As long as there aren't any signs
of time travellers trying to prevent
you from doing it;
do it.

Artists. People who are famous for the fact that they don't care about them.

You: "New glasses? Looks super, man!"

Clark Kent: "..."

Tomorrow
is often
the busiest
day of the week.

We were happy for quite a few years.

Then we met.

The worst thing about
online dating is seven
year olds pretending
to be an overweight,
fifty-something year
old single from Idaho
who recently got fired
because of some stupid reorganization.

Rehab is
for quitters.

Do not make
the same
mistake once.

Marriage
is the main
reason for
divorce.

Judgement Day?

Sorry, can't.

If animals could speak to us, they
wouldn't.

sh?rk

I just feel the need to mention something Nice about France.

Wish
thoughtful.

My parents-in-law don't have children, so I'm still single.

Great minds think.

I'd rather swim in a pool filled with armpits for the rest of my life than listen to someone who
exaggerates.

Iceland / Football team

Finnbogason, Bjarnason, Gunnarsson, Sigurðsson, Sævarsson, Árnason,
Sigþórsson, Halldórsson.

I get it. You're all somebody's son.

The future
is open to
suggestions

Aren't you that guy they always mix up with that other guy?

People make me love animals.

Alcohol damaged my short-term memory,
my long-time memory, but also my short-term memory.

When the
world zigs,
zag.

"Mind your step"
is a comment
that belongs on
a minefield.

Think
less
more

Numbers are weird.
Odd even.

Add a few dots in
the end to make your sentence appear more meaningful...

Today's therapy session for people with separation anxiety is cancelled due to the fact that last week's session hasn't finished yet.

If you need
some space
for yourself
to be alone,
try Google+

I've been thinking
and I came to the conclusion that maybe I should do this more often.

I think that new Coca-Cola line, i.e. "taste the feeling", could as easily have been a Durex-slogan to promote its flavoured condoms.

Politricks.

Less is

Suicide is away of life

I don't always have time but when I do, I don't.

Friends forever.

Dying is not an excuse.

I'm not autistic; it's just that there are as many i's in this line as there are a's.

A joke about sodium?
Na...

What actually
is the benefit
of the doubt?

Half of what I'm saying is meaning less than a third.

Unnecessary repetitions are often useless, redundant and unnecessary.

If you do it just
for show, sooner
or later it will.

"Cheap"also
costs money.

If you want many
people to attend
your funeral, you
better die young.

[ knock ]
Who's...
[ knock ]
Who's...
[ knock knock ]
Who's there?
[ knock knock knock ]
Who...
[ knock knock knock
knock knock ]
Fuck off, Fibonacci!

Frankly, I didn't even believe in reincarnation during my past life.

Food for thought:
eighty percent of
all people consider themselves to be
above average.

Greece.
The most recent Greek tragedy.

Does it often happen to you that, while you are reading something, you wish you could only get just a teeny bit quicker to the actual point?

Rule of grammar: double negatives are a no-no.

A univerisal
remote changes everything.

Shine
and rise.

But is it a superiority complex
if you are?

And now, for today's nerdy pun:
"If it ain't good, I can try to make it beta."

Freelance?
Who's Lance?

Although some might claim the opposite, my writing skills are quite versatile.

My vocabulary
for instance, is
quite versatile.

There is nothing worse than your phone charger getting stuck in
the wheels of your office chair and
that afterwards your parents die
in a forest fire.

To calculate your Body Mass Index, you simply divide the hours in total you spend on Netflix per day by the distance from your flat to the nearest fast food joint.

"Daisy who?"
- "Daisy me rollin', they hatin'."

"Why do you always
have to procrastinate everything?"
- "Can we talk about
that later?"

"I have to go to the loo."
- "Alright, see you later then. Toodeloo!"

Sign language
is quite handy.

In the meantime at
the Plastic Surgery Conference

"So, do you recognise
someone you know?"
- "Nope."

Seen it, done it, can't really remember it.

Fuck my life / Pt 01

"I still don't have
a koala pet."

"Be honest with
your partner about what you want."

[ Later during sex ]

- "I want a pet koala."