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Posts Liked by katrina_f4y

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle

344

Choose me or lose me.

I'm not a backup plan and definitely not a second choice.

75

The only dates I get are
updates.

98

may the bridges I burn light the way

96

if school had a sleeping class, not only would everyone pass...

But everyone could get some needed rest.

11

Make sure to have your idiot proof game on.

There are too many idiots out there that need to be exterminated.

7

Dear life,

I'm tired.

I'm going to sleep.

Don't wake me up unless you have the best damn excuse in the world.

16

Beyonce made a
song called
"Single Ladies"
then went home to her
husband and left you lonely hoes
dancing in a circle pretending to be
happy.

16

I'm not saying I did terrible things last night, but Satan woke up on my couch and won't make eye contact with me...

245

If you ran like your mouth, you'd be in good shape.

177

Better grab my dumbrella.

It's really stupid out there today.

294

In which language would you prefer I tell you how much I do not give a shit?

I have my translator app open, fire away.

182

Can you imagine parents nowadays explaining to their kids how they met?

"Well, it all started one day when your dad 'liked' one of my selfies."

218

i will tell you my sins

and you can sharpen your knife

132

Staring is caring.

118

i have this bumper sticker that says "honk if you think i'm sexy" and then i wait at green lights until i feel better about myself.

171

You are a tornado
with pretty eyes and a heartbeat.

179

He said the spark between us was gone, so I tasered him and I'll ask him again when he wakes up. ..

157

The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success

213

One day, I will solve my problems with maturity.

Today, however, it will be with alcohol.

219

admit it: life didn't fuck you,
it taught you.

160

People keep asking me "how's it going" like I have any idea what's going on at any point.

68

People keep asking me "how's it going" like I have any idea what's going on at any point.

184

Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave your house...

278

Dont make me choose between you and food because I would miss you.

333

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