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Posts Liked by jaybirdbold

Pretty busy today. Was only able to check my phone 1400 times.

145

HELP WANTED:
Experienced road crew for our band's world tour.

NO DJs* PLEASE

*DJs suck as roadies, because they're always dropping the bass.

10

The two most important days in your life are-the day you were born and the day you realize why.

°Mark Twain

26

If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself

33

facebook makes you hate people you already know

&boldomatic makes you love people you've never met

38

One day you'll find someone who doesn't care about your past because they want to be your future.

43

OOPS...

Did I roll my eyes out loud?

73

The one thing I like about voice messages

erasing them.

21

IF YOU THINK YOU WON, YOU ALREADY LOST.

13

Do I have to wake up?

I just woke up yesterday.

17

i don't know whether to take that as a compliment or a insult

9

Seriously.

Do you have pbatsd?

Post bird attack traumatic stress disorder.

8

R:
Oh it was very traumatic that fateful day

Gave me nightmares for weeks

But eventually, with some counseling and bird attack prevention classes, I finally stood up to my fears

5

you know all hell is about to be unleashed when your mom calls you by your middle name

15

Relax....

We're all crazy.
It's not a competition.

48

THIS IS YOUR LIFE. Do what you love, and do it often. If you don’t like something, change it. If you don’t like your job, quit. If you don’t have enough time, stop watching TV. If you are looking for the love of your life, stop; they will be waiting for you when you start doing things you love. Stop over analyzing, life is simple. All emotions are beautiful. When you eat, appreciate every last bite. Open your mind, arms, and heart to new things and people, we are united in our differences. Ask the next person you see what their passion is, and share your inspiring dream with them. Travel often; getting lost will help you find yourself. Some opportunities only come once; seize them. Life is about the people you meet and the things you create with them, so go out and start creating. Live your dream, and wear your passion. LIFE IS SHORT.

9

I like the nights.

Some of my best days were nights.

8

You must be tired after everything
we did in my dreams last night.

12

There's no better feeling than going to bed at night and not have to set an alarm for tomorrow morning

13

Age is a question of mind over matter.If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

10

Wait...
Did Boldomatic discontinue the licking because it may contain gluten and traces of nuts?

24

YOU CAN FORCE ME TO HELL,
BUT I WILL TAKE YOU WITH ME.

3

It didn't matter that I didn't understand her. She could have been telling me to go to Hell.
I always smiled.

28

today is the best today and it doesn't come back

enjoy it!

30

You never know a person until you meet them and get to know them, but even then, you never truly know them.

22

I do it because I can,

I can because I want to,

I want to because you said I couldn't. .

3

if reincarnation is like. legit.
and I come back as .. a bug.
I will no joke be like, yo god.
let's throw down.
just you and me.
here and now.

5

Some people, you can stay on the phone with, for hours, talking about the most ridiculous shit. Because, NO ONE, has ever walked to the bus, like YOU.

14

cutting off hair

is The One reliable thing

to improve life

7

I've never seen a Mcdonalds or a Burger King under construction.

They just show up.

389

me:
Wait do you know ppl who are something more than nerdish about this stuff or something? ?

R:
Do i personally know ppl, no. Unfortunately.
But they do exist
out there, somewhere,
where the nerds run free
and graze on comics

4

Do you ever rub your eyes so hard that you just start entering some other fucking dimension of swirls and patterns. ...

9

Listening to a story and all you can think is

"lie, lie, lie"

4

How to not procrastinate...

-Get off Boldomatic. But let's be honest that is never going to happen

8

For someone who loves to sleep i sure do stay up and browse the internet alot.

3

You can tell when there is something special.

When you can feel the goodness of it.

4

People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important! ..

6

"The wise never marry and when they do, they become otherwise. "

4

There is no hell like a bad conscience.

5

Do not judge by appearance a rich heart may be under a poor coat!

15

Hey assholes, if you don't have anything nice to say...don't say anything at all.

46

The problem with the world is there are a whole lot of angry people out there because things haven't gone right for them and their cynism, just like pollution in water, dilutes the pure population.

14

APATHY IS THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION FROM THE WORLD YOU'RE LOOKING FOR

13

I could stop.

17

all things possible

10

My extra sensitive toothpaste doesn't like it when I use other toothpastes.

27

I was on figurative mode and she caught me with the literal...

8

We all feel like disappearing every once in a while.

29

Sometimes
memories sneak
out of my eyes and
roll down my cheeks •

59

Sometimes I meet people and I am amazed that they have survived so long. Being complete assholes...

35

finally

it's window-wide-open-at-night-time

7

Hate you because you the only one who knows my weakness..but I guess I love you because im the one who showed you that side of me..

4

One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say!

17

No one acknowledges you otherwise, because you have nothing original or intelligent to say.

That's why.

7

Whenever a Bird Shit's on My Car, I Eat Scrambled Eggs on My Front Porch, Just to Let Them Know What I'm Capable of.

11

Another sleepless night ahead...no buddy to share the bed:(

6

When I'm with you, the only place I'd rather be is closer.

21

SOMEONE YOU CARE DEEPLY FOR,
DOESN'T EVEN KNOW.

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

28

SOMEONE YOU CARE DEEPLY FOR,
DOESN'T EVEN KNOW.

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

2

so many likes when all you need is love.

21

When a person's actions parallel their words, and indirectly parallel their feelings, there is an indescribable fluidity to their personality that leaves me in awe.

25

People
these days are so weird

20

"You send me happiness with every message you send me."

10

Some people are life-sucking, energy-draining, negative bags of annoying hell

7

Treat me like a Queen and I'll treat you like a King.

Treat me like game and I'll show you how its played.

17

My new neighbor screamed on her back patio that she hates everyone.

I already like her.

21

No matter how big your house is, how recent your car is, or how big your bank account is. Our graves will always be the same size.

STAY HUMBLE!

21

I automatically dislike anyone with my name because it feels like a competition and let's be honest...

You're not winning that!

7

In other words:
If you can hate them, now, you probably never loved them, then.

3

Before you speak:
Is it kind
Is it true
Is it necessary

3

A people that values its privileges above its principles -

soon loses both

2

finally

it's window-wide-open-at-night-time

7

If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane.

• Robert Frost

36

Not all taken are in love.

13

You learn more
about a person
at the end of a
relationship
than at the
beginning •

68

I love when you have to read the tags to understand the post:)

20

Without my kids, my house would be clean, my nights would be quiet and my wallet would be full.

But my heart would be so damn empty!

4

Like a welcome summer rain,
humor may
suddenly
cleanse and cool
the earth, the air
and you.

• Langston Hughes

16

Having nowhere to go is irrelevant when anywhere we are together is where we want to be

18

GONNA STARE AT MY IPHONE TIL IT DIES,

THEN I'MMA USE MY MAC

18

People
who
talk
shit
are
reincarnated
as
toilet
paper.

31

Before humans and dogs were friends who fixed dog ears when they went inside out?

11

we're the same, just different.

32

ATTN. NEWBIES:
Any dumbass who still uses "gay" as a synonym for "bad" or "stupid" will be immediately unfollowed.
Take that shit somewhere else. Thanks.
And have a nice day.

101

We were afraid of the same dragon,
on opposite sides
of the bridge.
But only one was brave to risk,
running under its legs, for the pleasure of burning by kiss.

12

"You," he said, "are a terribly real thing, in a terribly false world, and that, I believe, is why you are in so much pain."

• Emilie Autumn

32

And if God/The Gods/some "Higher Power," does exist, He/She/It created me, too.

16

Thank you BOLDMATIC!!!!.
For the first time since some tragedies occurred in my life you have all given me a sense of belonging by sharing your words and allowing me to share mine with you...
It seems like such a small thing to many but I am beginning to heal... I never knew that I would ever be capable of healing but I can feel it..
Your giving me a place to express my feelings at times they can b hard to keep in .... I am getting things out in a positive healthy way so Keep it up Boldmatic you are doing good in lives if your helping me your helping so many others as well...

42

THIS IS YOUR LIFE. Do what you love, and do it often. If you don’t like something, change it. If you don’t like your job, quit. If you don’t have enough time, stop watching TV. If you are looking for the love of your life, stop; they will be waiting for you when you start doing things you love. Stop over analyzing, life is simple. All emotions are beautiful. When you eat, appreciate every last bite. Open your mind, arms, and heart to new things and people, we are united in our differences. Ask the next person you see what their passion is, and share your inspiring dream with them. Travel often; getting lost will help you find yourself. Some opportunities only come once; seize them. Life is about the people you meet and the things you create with them, so go out and start creating. Live your dream, and wear your passion. LIFE IS SHORT.

9

Saw some girl texting while driving on my way home and it really pissed me off. So I rolled down my window and threw my beer at her.

6

Everybody has a girlfriend or boyfriend, and i'm just over here like "I love food."

8

Everybody has a girlfriend or boyfriend, and i'm just over here like "I love food."

22

When I say to my mother, "I love U2," why does she say, "love you back?" Is there a new band called You Back?

12

What do you mean, you "Don't believe in homosexuality"? It's not like the Easter Bunny, your belief isn't necessary!

15

The most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said, or never explained.

7

People get stuck in traffic on their way to ride stationary bicycles at the gym.

11

*

If we find each other, more than once,
under different conditions,
and no machinations, on either's part,
it is no coincidence.

23

Fall in love or fall in hate. Get inspired or be depressed. Ace a test or flunk a class. Make babies or make art. Speak the truth or lie and cheat. Dance on tables or sit in the corner. Life is divine chaos. Embrace it. Forgive yourself. Breathe. And enjoy the ride..

49

Did you know that if you put your ear up a strangers leg you can hear them say:
What the fuck are you doing?!?

13

i hate when my internet is slow, I might as well just drive to the google headquarters and ask them shit in person.

8

* . : " . *. : . + •
' : : *. " •.'.* :.•*.: .
• * ' *.•.', *. •: *. *

According to astronomy,
when you wish uppon a
star yuo're actually a
few million years late.

That star is dead.

Just like your dreams.

9

Got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You read that wrong too.

5

Some see things
as they are
and ask why.

Others dream things that never were
and ask why not.

(George Bernard Shaw)

6

Working hard for something we don't care is called stress.

Working hard for something we love is called passion.

4

A bicycle runs on fat and saves you money,

a car runs on money and makes you fat.

20

it's no wonder
we did it this way,
kept looking forward on paths sideways.
it's everything
that is connected and beautiful,
and now I know
just where I stand.

4

Butterflies can't see their wings. They can't see how truly beatiful they are, but everyone else can. People are like that as well.

- Anonymous -

19

If the brain was so simple that we could understand it, it would be so simple that we couldn't.

9

Some peolpe are so poor, all they have is money.

13

if you've been left, go write

254

Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo daVinci, Thomas Jefferson and Albert Einstein.

2

Sometimes we choose to make people special in our lives, but they
choose to be assholes. Understand, it's much more a reflection on their bad choices, than yours. Don't let it turn your heart.

26

Having a soulmate is not always about love. You can find your soulmate in a friendship too.

6

The best ride is usually the most unsafe one that normally breaks exactly whatever safety protocol is in place-for said ride you are taking;

i.e. riding towards* the thunderstorm on the jet skis, rather than *away.

4

I hate the phrase

"kids will be kids"

I think it should be replaced with

"bad parenting results in assholes"

9

They told me that to make him fall in love i had to make him laugh. But everytime he laughs i'm the one who falls in love.

23

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be
dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right
foot with your left.

3

..the sea's only gifts are harsh blows and, occasionally, the chance to feel strong. Now, I don't know much about the sea, but I do know that that's the way it is here. And I also know how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong but to feel strong, to measure yourself at least once, to find yourself at least once in the most ancient of human conditions, facing blind, deaf stone alone, with nothing to help you but your own hands and your own head..

2

Rather than love,
than money,
than fame,
give me truth•

10

ever since life stopped being explainable, things have been pretty alright.

7

I am perpetually in full favor of always mentioning the odds.

3

Believe only half of what you see

and nothing that you hear.

8

I'm just going to eat a small piece of this HUGE chocolate bunny that I hid in the freezer. You really can't hide things from yourself!!!

4

"Don't gain the world and lose your soul, wisdom is better than silver or gold."

Bob Marley

22

stuff you ask your mom:
-mom what do we eat for dinner
-mom when do you come back
-mom what day is it
-mom what time is it
-mom where's my phone

stuff you ask your dad:
-dad where is mom

3

Some just break hearts for fun; to feel like they're special. Don't let them make you forget that you're special, too.

30

People say "if theres a god, he wouldnt allow such things to happen". How do you know? Maybe gods allow such things to happen for a reason. if they helped us everytime shit hit the fan, than we would never question their existence. And in all honesty, i think thats the point. They want that sense of people having faith and taking the time to connect with them on another level. if we got what we wanted everytime we prayed we wouldnt learn anything from life. & thats the best part, living life that was given. DApolakovs

7

God created man first, because every artist makes a rough draft, before the final masterpiece.

2

i am made of flaws stitched together with good intentions

19

When we die, the light in the end of the tunnel...

Is a train.

1

My mood depends on how good my hair looks •

2

We are all here
to have dreams and thoughts
that we should never lose.

37

If you are reading this it means that you have survived your entire life up to this point. congrats mother fucker you're awesome.

24

Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.

12

it was a sad moment knowing that the only place i can see you now are my dreams

23

To take instantaneously to a person when you once thought yourself incapable of loving, or an activity you once thought yourself unable to master, is to meet fate.

Don't fuck it up.

14

Intent is everything.
The headspace with which you engage with another, is what matters, at the end of the day. I know I always approach people from the right place, even if they didn't.

13

LIFE GOALS
• Finish college
• GTFO of USA

10

"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain."

19

From the moment we're born, we spend our entire lives trying to learn how to open our arms to the rest of the world; ever fighting the fetal position. Some of us get farther than others.

18

Women want someone who can make them laugh and someone who they feel safe with,
so basically, a clown ninja.

58

I'm finally comfortable in bed...

But then BAM, have to pee!

11

21

And maybe at night when we're all a little too tired and a little too truthful, that's when we see ourselves for who we really are.

165

I am
whatever
you
say
I am;
if
I
wasn't,
then
why
would
you
say
I am.

4

*
LIFE HAS NO
REMOTE.
GET UP AND
CHANGE IT
YOURSELF.

11

3 out of 4 voices in my head want to sleep

( the other wants to know if penguins have knees! )

9

Imagine if we could speak to animals.

...Maybe then spiders and people wouldn't be afraid of each other.

21

When shit becomes valuable, the poor will be born without assholes.

~ Henry Miller US author (1891 - 1980)

35

some of the best moments in life are the ones you can't tell anyone about

160

Love isn't blind,
it's retarded.

109

Your silence
is a form of
picking sides,
too.

21

When the rain washes you clean, you'll know...

You will know...

8

I know everything happens for a reason, but sometimes I wish I knew what that reason was.

92

In my opinon, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.
~ Diablo Cody, "Juno"

13

Maybe the reason you can't trust yourself is because you know, deep down, that fear conspires with you to choose against you.

18

so if olive oil is made of olives, then baby oil... OMG

13

You bring the bridge.
I will bring the fire.

17

I dream of a better world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned.

9

I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty

and I could not have described it any better

296

I love gay people.
Or as I sometimes call them, "people."

107

time heals all wounds, but it also creates some

14

YES, WE MUST ALL SELF-REFLECT - BUT, ALSO TRUE, GOOD FRIENDS WILL NOT STAND BY IDLY WHILE YOU THROW STONES AT YOURSELF, EITHER.

10

The world is full of magic; to not understand this is failure to embrace one's true self.

17

I WOULD LOSE WEIGHT

BUT I HATE LOSING

173

When you're stressed, you eat ice cream, cake, chocolates & sweets. Why?

Because STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS.

MIND = BLOWN

17

Once upon a time,

there was a plastic bag full of other plastic bags somewhere in almost every household.

The End

17

I dig, you dig, he dig, she dig, they dig....

it's not a beautiful poem, but it's very deep.

54

I like trains.

13

True friends stab you
in the front

13

Went to switch my mood to 'Pleasant' but the controller got stuck on 'Random,'
your guess is now as good as mine.

9

Your many faces don't shake my faith.

They prove me right.

10

Gerrymandering is a form of oppression,
like burning books and other attempts at silencing any voices of dissent.

7

The right people will find you, no matter what.

29

Some people have the calm before the storm.

I have the panic before the nothing.

15

I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty

and I could not have described it any better

583

Sometimes I just look up, smile, and say,

"I know that was you MOM thanks!"

9

okay, ok and k are three completely different things

16

when you know how bad something hurts, you don't pass it around.

Instead, you do your best to prevent others from feeling the same way,

even if they were the same people that hurt you in the first place.

11

Don't underestimate me. I know more than I say, think more than I speak, and notice more than you realize.

19

Today, 2 year olds can unlock an iPhone, open and close their favorite apps all by themselves.

When I was that age,
I was eating dirt.

617

I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.

310

I watched a girl in a sundress kiss another girl on a park bench, and just as the sunlight spilled perfectly onto both of their hair, I thought to myself:
"How bravely beautiful it is, that sometimes, the sea wants the city, even when it has been told its entire life it was meant for the shore. "

13

this absolute silence fills the world and that's what makes it so loud

13

It's a strange myth that atheists have nothing to live for. It's the opposite. we have nothing to die for. We have everything to live for.
--Ricky Gervais

12

Once upon a time, I was out
with my photographer friend at
a popular bar in DC on frat* night accidentally. Bored and with a friend near the restrooms, I said, "BEHOLD the wild animals, dry humping in their natural habitat," as I drew the giant curtain back displaying the dance floor.

I've never seen anyone choke
on a beer like that before.

5

People are weird.

44

You text me, I respond in 15 seconds, then apparently you die of excitement

Because 2 hours later I'm still waiting for your response.

9

It is hard to explain how you know things you shouldn't before you should when nobody has told you anything yet.

16

until 0% battery do us part

337

I'm not afraid of dying, I just don't want to that's all.

8

When nothing is going RIGHT!

Quickly go LEFT!

3

FACT:
The person you love will never love you and the person who loves You, you can't love him ....
life

4

To be in the 1%, you have to do what 99% won't.

69

How to get laid:

1) Lay on bed...

Wait 1 hour until lay becomes past tense.

15

What is "normal"?

11

I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.

16

Think of a number

Add eight

Half it

Minus the number you started with

Close your eyes...

It's dark isn't?

9

Whoever said nothing is impossible, clearly never tried stapling water to a tree!

7

Reasons I check my voicemail:

1% to hear the message.
99% to get rid of that annoying icon.

10

There are some people who could hear you speak a thousand words and still not understand you.

And there are others who will understand without you even speaking a word.

22

You don't have a Valentine?

Some people don't have a mother on mother's day or a father on father's day, so
SHUT UP!

61

,,If you love two people at the same time, choose the second one, because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second,,

~Johnny Depp

164

if energy can neither be created nor destroyed, what if our souls are a fragmented collection of other people's souls from the past and future? what if our dreams are their memories?

70

Quiet people have the loudest minds.

355

If fantasy was realistic -
reality would be fantastic.

181

100% of non-
smokers die too.

213

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