SimoneG's Posts

He doesn't even have a face for radio.

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reposted by swatchUSA

Now you're just somebody that I used to know...

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Why don't I find that reassuring?

If someone describes themselves as: "Like Marmite", I know I'll hate them.

If anyone likens something to a "rollercoaster ride", cover your ears and hum loudly until they stop talking.

If anyone starts a sentence: "I'm not being funny, but..."
Cover your ears and hum loudly until they stop talking.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

- Robert Frost

Drunken blonde: I don't even believe you're playing Pinochle.

Drunken blonde: "She hasn't even got what I've got."
Jerry: "What she's got you couldn't spell - and what you've got, you used to have." - The Barefoot Contessa

"The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place." -

George Bernard Shaw.

"Courage, dear heart"
-C S Lewis

Sharks only attack when you are wet.

"Nothing says 'Scram' like 500 pounds of pig iron"

"I refuse to accept criticism from someone who's hiding under a table"

I'd never eat a panda.

If I could live my life over again, I wouldn't wear these pants.

"You make a pretty good argument for a guy in a rabbit suit"

The Tick

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"I am here to fight evil and exchange good-natured barbs"

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"Ohhh... I got scammed by a monkey"

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"Please don't strike matches on our monsters"

- The Tick

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"If life gives ya lemons...
kill a few guys"

- The Tick

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"The local ninja union has demanded shorter working hours and free dry cleaning." - The Tick

Save money on expensive tickets to outdoor summer festivals. Simply erect a tent in your garden - piss on the side of it, and steal your own shoes...

"A brass unicorn has been catapulted across a London street and impaled an eminent surgeon. Words fail me, gentlemen."

The Abominable Dr. Phibes

According to the Kinsey Report, 1 in 6 men in Iowa has had sex with a chicken.

Turns out my Achilles heel is my Achilles' heel.

"Not all those who wander are lost."

J. R. R. Tolkien

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"Forget it, Jake; it's Chinatown"

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"Be a sadist. No matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them in."

Kurt Vonnegut

“Sex with Nicholas was like having a very large wardrobe with a very small key falling on top of you.” An ex lover of former Tory MP Nicholas Soames

"If you are vibrating on the right plane, you will inevitably come in contact with others who can help you. It's like tuning in on your radio. If you get the right wave-length, you have your station." June Mathis (1889 - 1927)

NEVER FASTEN YOUR SHOELACE IN A REVOLVING DOOR.