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To us: it looks like disaster. To history: a paragraph; maybe two.
Be the reason someone smiles today. Be the reason someone feels loved. Be the reason someone believes in the goodness in people.
kind until they are not
Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers; not thunder.
Trying to decide if I want to look like a snack or keep eating snacks...
CRAPPY DIEM. What happens when you seize the wrong day.
"Tomorrow belongs to those who can hear it coming." David Bowie
We are teachers. We are lovers. We live on through everything we touch. We are like no one else. We are mothers.
I'm pretty busy today, so if you could just go ahead and offend yourself for me, that would be great. Thanks!
Praying for the people of Gaza who are being subjected to open air imprisoned camps with no food, water, meds or any supplies. My heart goes out to the innocent. May God help all those who are in harms way.
Life is not what you make it. It is what you dont let it make you.
"Who is they?"
“Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” Philip K. Dick
We can't find what's next if we stay shackled to what's not working.
We are the dreamers who made it out alive
When they ask me if my cup is half full or half empty, my response is, that I am thankful I HAVE a cup.
I work in the office. But when I break it down, I just press the buttons on a keyboard.
My mother taught me: Never discuss politics or religion; I'll just lose friends. But nowadays, it seems like that's all anybody wants to talk about, and if I decline to engage in these topics of conversation, I'm still just as liable to lose friends.
Wake me up when daylight saving time ends.
Things are going to be different for me from here on out because I've taken a new position. It's the fetal position and I plan to be in it for awhile.
As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no anvil ~Wile E. Coyote~
Why is it called 'After Dark', when it really is, 'After Light'?
We are magnificent
If aliens land, and they say "take us to your leader" we will have to go "errm... could you come back later? Now is not a good time".
kind until they are not
Did not Earn It
You don't know what the pain of betrayal truly is until you find out there is no puppy or candy after you get in the van
I don't curse (or cuss as we say locally). I speak fluent construction worker with a trucker dialect and a sailor accent.
We can't find what's next if we stay shackled to what's not working.
The closest way I know how to describe whiskey is that it tastes like I'm going to be passed out in the Waffle House parking lot at 3am
APRIL FOOL'S DAY IS CANCELED THIS YEAR due to the fact that nobody can top the current running joke on us all, the next 3 years are also canceled.
I've started investing in stocks. Beef, chicken, and vegetable. Someday I hope to become a boullionaire.
I think too highly of myself to be worried about being called a narcissist.
I guess you are hiding your Tesla in your garage too now, aren't you?
To smithereens has got to be one of the worst ways to get blown. Unless we're talking about to one of the band's songs. I like a lot of their music.
Digression is the way of the walk.
Stupidity is a walk in the park for some but...just plain dumbness, well that's a ride in the loony bin on a daily basis!
Is listening to Christmas music in April too late or too early? Asking for a friend.
there is such a thing as a connection between deeds and consequences - you reap what you sow.
april 1st. the only day of the year when people think carefully about whether what they read on the internet is really true.
getting older is a little like losing superpowers you never knew you had.
It turned out to be overwhelming emotions.
I canceled my sperms bank appointment today. I told them I couldn't come.
The jokes on you Wal-Mart lady. I was planning to go f**k myself later anyway.
I remember the time I brought a therapist to a family gathering. You could hear dollar signs cha-chinging in his head.
You are way too flammable to be speaking to me like this.
I wish I weren't so nemesismatic.
When the machines rise up against the humans, just pray to God that you're nowhere near a dildo factory.
It's not illegal. It's just frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.
laundry today or naked tomorrow
You look like something I draw with my left hand.
There is a big difference between a guy and a girl saying, "I went through an entire box of tissues during that movie."
Whenever I delete an app on my phone, the shaking icons make me feel like they're all panicked over who's getting axed •
My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"
I HOPE YOUR DAY IS AS NICE AS YOUR BUTT
If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
LISTEN TO SILENCE
With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything
I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.
If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself
Voices in your head - normal Listening to them - common Arguing with them - acceptable Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM
i just burnt my tongue on some food they say the ones you love hurt you the most
THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.
Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.
Sun goes down earlier for short people.
If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.
justice is a beautiful concept. unicorns too.
I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty and I could not have described it any better
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.
10% of conflicts are due to differences in opinion. 90% are due to wrong tone of voice.
I like to be alone. But I would rather be alone with you.
i've fallen in love with you, but you don't exist.
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