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Real alcoholism.

Just filled up my
wine spritz
with wine.

9

Today, I'll come home so tired that I'll leave my legs out of my bed.

Come and get me demons.

8

The expiration date on bottled water is for the bottle, not the water.

12

My bae...

I don't have any...

1

Life is peachy.

6

Nutella.

Everywhere.

9

No matter how kind you are, german children are kinder.

17

I know this is just our second date, and maybe I'm moving to fast...

...but I want permission to rename your cat.

3

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