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JulioTorres

comedian, prince and telepath

twitter.com/juliothesquare

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JulioTorres

i have this awful bruise from when i fell from heaven

6

The Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree is practically almost done with his vodka soda, looking around and wondering "we're still going right? its not over right? I'll stay for a little longer I mean who knows"

2

I've boiled water maybe twice in my life, mostly out of curiosity.

3

coming up with a form of therapy were your psychological issues become physical adversaries you have to wrestle, that way at least you workout and strengthen your core; all sweat no tears.

2

ugh what's the point of gazing out this window if no one's here to see it

6

i never said my dog ate my homework but i did have to be like "it's actually at home because i wrote it with lipstick on a mirror"

3

"i put it off for a while because sure it's a fun idea but not like a NECESSITY"
-the cosmos, on creating me

4

It's so sad when you get to that last matryoshka doll and have nothing else to look forward to. Things can only get so small I suppose.

1

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