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Posts Liked by AdamC

If someone points at your black clothes and asks, whos funeral it is, you just look around the room, and answer, 'haven't decided yet.'

247

If you walk like a duck and you talk like a duck you're drunk. Ducks don't talk.

157

I'm opening a gym called "Resolutions". It will have exercise equipment in it for the first two weeks, then it turns into a bar for the rest of the year.

255

Shout out to everyone who has seriously looked up whether it was legal to marry food

103

Welcome to Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous.

I see a lot of new faces in the room this week and I'm very disappointed with all of you.

163

It's not that I'm tired.

It's just that I don't like standing on my feet with my eyes open.

173

Apple CEO announces he's gay. Samsung CEO announces he's more gay and water resistant.

244

The loneliest people are the kindest, the saddest people smile the brightest, the most damaged people are the wisest, All because they do not want to see people suffer the way they do.

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