tontonk's Posts

Je n'écoute que très rarement les gens, car les gens pense trop rarement

Don't wanna go to the gym:
deeply understand and avoid the break_fast

This is all the fuck I do not give:

LA
BASE,
C'EST
PLUS!
Tonk tm.

Why
Did
Noah
Saved
The
Mosquito?

I wanna leave for a journey in Dewey's head.

Before going to work, I scream in my head:

BANGERANG!!!

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Each time I exhale smoke through my nose, a part of me truly believe that I'm part dragon. Neat, innit?

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Eat an apple a day,
Keep the doctor away.

Okay! What should I eat to avoid assholes?

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In MimeTown,
Poking someone in the stomach would resolve in a bloodshed

Reposted from ErikSmit

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Angelina's mouth is so fake,
She can't even tell the truth anymore

#plasticsurgery

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I'm so better than you at nose jobs!

Classical bragging from Nip to Tuck

#plasticsurgery

When you practice plastic surgery on a Barby doll, do you call that surgery?

#plasticsurgery

Half of my patients didn't come today...
for the moment!

I'm in a Shrodinger's Hulk status

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Triangle/Square/Circle
0-1-3-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10
abcdefghijklmnopqrstu
vwxyz
and lots and lots of drawing and playing...

Only Useful Education

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i want to fuck you so bad right now.

damn autocorrect..

i meant hey.

Reposted from swag-fiir3

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Original hate #5:

Bloody dandhypsters

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HashTag
Fuck-Off

You
are
sad
like
an
empty
fridge.

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Guilty pleasure of the moment:

Bring me to life by Evanescence on Singstar

Sorry...

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Dyslexic joke....

What is the badassest MMA human organ?

The Pancreas

Putain de saloperie de bordel a couilles de sa race de mort que j'deterre avec ma mon braque devface de cul de mammouth acariatre et chauve sale avec des pustules de brun de ras la mouke de sacre calisse de tabernacle de nom de nom de sacrebleu et sacrevindieu

French composition around insult and anger by myself - 2015

Hello!

These are basic polite rules:
a smile
hello
goodbye
thank you
Feel free to use them, your life will be forever changed. And mine as well.

Thank you & goodbye :-)

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Always disturbed by the little stuff
on my way to the
top of the world

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- .
- ?
- .
- ?
- !
- ?!?
- : .
- .
(complete this dialogue, multiple right answers)

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BOLDOMATIC

You just have to give a nickname and a short description of yourself.
Maybe there you will be the real YOU!

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I wanna live 'till I die

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Don' t
Put
Dolby
On a
Snake
Detector
Bill Bailey

Aqua Man
Moby Dick
Finding Nemo

Subliminal sex stuff, I say!

#escapetheaquarium

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#Hard, #Core, #Hardcore

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Nono
Nononono
Nononono
Nono
There's no lim

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Reposted from Yakooza

Just a Fish of Gold,
Glass Ball filled of water-o
Another Glitter Meal,
No one here to share-o

I send a Bloop-Bloop-Bloop to the world

#escapetheaquarium

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Baking cookies and waiting for them to cool down.

That's a real torture

MaScho likes this

A wise man is one who appreciates a wiser man.

Reposted from MyM

I'm not good at advice, may I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Reposted from anonymous

Show a girl you don't care and she'll chase you. Show a woman you don't care and she'll replace you.

Reposted from wiltun

To all my real friends, don't envy me the One I love,
Just be prepared to welcome Yours,
Be assured that I'm prepared and happy to share Our Happiness with You all.

And fuck jealousy in the butthole, a'right!

UserOne likes this

Fantastic definition of a real man by Vaya Con Dios:

He was nice and gentle
But rough enough
To get her satisfied

UserOne likes this

A friend of mine is quiting is meaningless bachelor life, his own words, go try the real big Love with the Woman who is waiting for him...
Because of me. It is both a great and fantastic feeling and such a righteous burden

UserOne likes this

Online Porn =
Ho-Low-Cost

"There is a difference between I'm sorry and I apologize. At least at a funeral"

Demetri Martin

Be a man like Bana!
Cook like Ramsay!
Fuck like Ferrara!
Think like Einstein!
If you can, at least try!

But live like Yourself, damn it!

The worst advice is the advice itself.

Bored as Hell
Doing the same stuff
Over and over again

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That moment when you really really need to pee and you finally can!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ (0_o) ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

And the other one when you really really need to take a shit and you're too late....

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Sometimes you find out for yourself

Sometimes you need to be told

Sometimes you never find the answer

The Streets

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Having a kid

is both the best and the scariest turning point in your life

#turningpoint

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Ordinary hate #5:

If food was humans, pizzas would be bimbos with too much make up...OK! But poor nachos would ve covered by vomit and semen.

gone
w th the w nd

Reposted from elidealista

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BIG NEWS: people around you DO exist. Say hi, or even better: smile!

Reposted from elidealista

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NA'VI
OR
SMURF
?

soil+seed+water+time=

sweet shadow in a park

I am one Candy Crush invite away from murdering someone.

Reposted from Blitzkrieg

bolds
are
like
cute
innocent
little
bonheurs

Ordinary hate #4:

Elevetors situations... Easy listening and/or awkward smells

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Bolds
will
be
a
great
subtitute
to
cigarettes
....
when
I
decide
to
quit

meohmy and JodieT like this

Questions dat matter #3:

When a dinosaur smokes weed, id he stoned afterwards?

#talks, #pantone, #guess

#talks, #pantone

#talks, #pantone

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APPENDICITIS:

× <----- AaRgh!!!

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Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I am schizophrenic,

So am I

janem803, Mel.Filsinger, meohmy, MyM and JodieT like this

My lack of faith would have been at a huge turning point, if the Bible didn't forget that Earth is round and the kangaroos.

#turningpoint

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CESAR

•Roman emperor and dictator

•superevolved messiah ape

•dog food (respect to Eddie Izzard by the way)

Ordinary Hate #3

Next global war targets:

•Yesmen
•Hipsters
•Tattoo Artists
•Fitness dictators
•New age wasters
•{please place anyone else}

Last night
Boldmatic
saved my
Life from
Facebook
Wooooooo
Last night
Boldmatic
saved my
Life...........

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questions dat matter #2:

If sideways were covered by dicks, would assholes walk on their but?

First laugh of my baby this morning,
On the day I start to work again,
Maybe he's the next Louis CK

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Ceci n'est pas un bold

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Ceci n'est pas un bold

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reposted by JodieT

Do you read me?

Reposted from JodieT

@

janem803, UserOne, PenSword72 and JodieT like this

If there were cop pigs, I would love to pet one et whisper to it:

Fuck you! Human!

Ordinary hate #2:

Would love to meet two ana from the FBI & ask'em:

"You the feds?"

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Point of view #2:

When I stand, I'm quite tall, and almost everyone can see inside my nose.
But when I sit, it is my turn to be exposed to nastrals intimacy.
Bloody dilemna, innit?

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TRINITY
• sexy black leather girl in a matrix
• two guys and a ghost in an heaven

If you don't like something, just take away its only power:

Your attention.

Reposted from 2schaa

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Talk
Geeky
To
Me

Reposted from JodieT

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Questions Dat Matter #1

Do all motherfuckers suffer from Oedipus complex?

On the first of april,
Mr. T is even more pitying the Fool!

tontonk likes this

Ordinary Hate #1:

Jesus was able to see Love beetween the people.

Mozart the Notes between the lines.

And I, the Stuff you ate at lunch beetween your teeth.

Can't wait the next guy...

JodieT likes this

Ordinary Hate #1:

Jesus was able to see Love beetween the people.

Mozart the Notes between the lines.

And I, the Stuff you ate at lunch beetween your teeth.

Can't wait the next guy...

Without your bloody SUV, you are just a skinny white guy who really, really, really need to stop to honk like he's the manly Man

UserOne and bold like this

some people just need a hug

...around the neck

...with a rope.

Reposted from bold

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Point of view #1:

Lay back with my baby boy and my beautiful wife watching a movie and thinking of the size of the universe and our socalled occidental meaningless way of life...
Damn, I'm simply happy!

Point of view #1:

Lay back with my baby boy and my beautiful wife watching a movie and thinking of the size of the universe and our socalled occidental meaningless way of life...
Damn, I'm simply happy!

JodieT and dor1316 like this

If humans are the viruses of mother Earth,

Hipsters are Herpes.

Being a gentlemen doesn't make you a pussy. It gets you the pussy.

Reposted from anonymous

Globalization:

rare & mispelled condition of glowing testicles (ex: Green Lantern)

INSOMNIA:
misunderstood 48 hours day

I wish I could send hipsters to another time where they belong...
In an arena...
Filled with hungry lions...
And no electricity yet for their laptops!

#awkward

bold likes this

French people:
a "je ne sais quoi" of chaotic happiness that bother evryone even themselves.

signed by a frenchy

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There is two kinds of Friends fans:
- Those who knew that they were on a break.
- And a bunch of bloody morons.

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Winter is coming, yeah, yeah!
But the next bieber's song as well... sadly.

Tout est complexe, rien n'est compliqué

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