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Even on the days I hate myself,
I still think "at least I have nice legs."

40

I really need to sort out my emoji issues.

28

waiting for
tiny nothings

8

is there a height limit? Because I feel small sometimes

10

I feel mean
throwing your
tooth away. It's
like a tiny little
wish, wrapped
in tissue, and far
more precious
than any coin.

16

My friend has one of those new Mini-Coopers
Her battery was dead

I gave her a jump-Start
With my Mini iPad

12

?¢????lla

11

Oh please
your sorry
excuses
are a dollar for ten
So go tell your friends
That you only took a tiny
little piece of my heart

9

Are any reporters around?
If so, please ask Trump about UFOs.

10

your kisses are snowflakes:

each one is unique.

they land on me, before they melt away and leave me cold.

9

Can't have a road trip here,
there's too many traffic lights, road blocks and ERP (Electronic Road Pricing)!

8

the element of surprise wasn't allowed near the Periodic table.

7

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